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At what age do you think is too old to be living with parents? (self.asklemmy)

submitted 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) by treechicken to c/asklemmy

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Background+rant: I'm in my early to mid-20s and still living at home with my dad. I'm not a NEET and am employed at a normal office job. I enjoy the comfort of my home. I like being with family (and I believe they feel blessed to have their kid at home longer). I like not having to pay rent. However, I also keep feeling some nagging pressure to "grow up and leave the nest".

Everything in my mind tells me that moving out is irrational. I would lose 1/3rd of my income to rent, go through a bunch of logistical hoops to find a new place, lose the last few moments I have with my family, just so I can prove to nobody that I'm independent, maybe discover new things, and also probably get in on some of that loneliness action that the rest of my generation is going through.

Yet, the pressure is still there. No one looks down on me for it, but I feel a bit embarrassed to tell people I'm living at home, like I'm admitting failure or incompetency. My friends will occasionally ask when I'm planning on moving out and the question just lingers longer than it should in my head. I compare myself to my parents and grandparents and can't help but feel like a child compared to the people they were when they were at my age.

Obviously quite conflicted on this, so I'm interested in seeing what others have to say.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

There’s a point for some people where you live with your parents because they can’t really take care of themselves, you don’t have kids and are free to move… uh, speaking from personal experience. My dad is losing it and my mom is close to that, and I just ended a relationship recently so it makes sense I’d live with them and help them in the interim. It’s not exactly a new relationship magnet though.

As far as your situation, you’ll know when the time is right to move out imo. The standards of “move out and have your own house at 18” is outdated due to realistic modern economics. It would be when you meet someone and want to move in with them and taking them to your parents would seems absurd. You’re educated, you have a job, you’re expressive, you’re doing fine.