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why are incels frowned/hated upon? (self.asklemmy)

submitted 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) by Darth_Vader__ to c/asklemmy

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Obviously I can understand why mysoginists are hated upon, As their belief is all women are trash or men are superior etc. But why are incels also generally hated upon? They are lacking in a way that makes them unable to gey in a relationship, but that shouldn't necessarily mean they are mysoginists, right?

What am I missing here? I haven't ever had a relationship with a woman, but I don't hate all women either. I just consider myself unlucky. Does that make me an incel?

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[–] prime_number_314159 22 points 8 months ago

There's a crucial distinction between someone that wants to have sex, but cannot, and someone that chooses to identify as that. To really become an "incel" in the negative sense, you lose the desire to have sex because being denied sexual contact by others is part of your identity now.

People that merely don't find others that are sexually interested in them can do things to help themselves, learn better grooming habits, dress nicer, practice approaching and talking to people, etc. Someone that has adopted the identity of "incel" can only help themselves by changing their perception away from the toxic void they found.