The stuff about “we don’t tell the whole truth”…. Pisses me off. As parents… part of your job is to prepare them to move into the real world, and to cope with the dangers inherent in it.
It actually reminds me of a time I got in trouble with the SiL. My niece and nephew we’re riding with her driving and there was a bad accident. Broken bodies on the ground, motorcyclist was a grease smear. Bad enough to get a blurb on the local news. (It was caused by the motorcyclist weaving through traffic. One car didn’t see him because he was going 60 in a 45 and bouncing through relatively dense traffic that was going 40 or so. More on that later.)
Now. This impacted the kids. A lot. Especially the nephew. SiL told the nephew that if he prayed and really believed, really believed… god would protect them. So if there ever really scared… you know. Just pray.
So the next time I’m picking them up for a little TTRPG and a sleep over- stardrifter home brews. They’re PG when the kids are over. Even the murder hobo behaves. So I’m pulling out and the kids were all freaking out “we need to pray first!”
So I met them do their thing and then they ask the really difficult questions. “Why don’t you pray? So god keeps you safe.” Difficult because.. I’ve not made an issue of being atheist with my family. (They might know, it’s not a secret but I didn’t really announce it either)
“Why do I need to pray for safety?”
“Because car crashes happen if you don’t.” The brakes may have skidded, so I can focus on the conversation. This is…. Not uncommon... I’m ocd about being a safe driver, even when they’re not in the car. And these conversations happen a lot because they’re kids… and they ask questions. And certain people suck at answering difficult questions.
“So, why do you think not praying causes car accidents?”
“They don’t? But they happen and if you didn’t pray, god won’t keep you safe. Mom said so.”
“Your mom said that?”
“Yes…”
“I’m curious. Do you know how many accidents your mom has been in?”
“3. But she says one doesn’t count. [because she backed into a bollard.]”
“I actually know about six.” (Yup.) “do you know how many accidents I’ve been in? Including ones that don’t count? None. Ever. You don’t need to pray for safety with me because I take steps to keep you safe. For example, I pulled over so we could talk.”
This of course leads to other bits of things I do as a matter of driving safely.
They don’t feel the need to pray because they see how I’m aware if things and actively mitigate risks. They also maybe started telling SiL how to drive. (She’s a terrible driver.)(edit:also they're really bossy. this is why I got in trouble.)