this post was submitted on 29 Aug 2023
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[–] GCanuck 375 points 1 year ago (16 children)

“You’re in contempt of court. You have been fined $x and continued refusal to swear the oath will land you in prison until you do. Jackass.”

That’s what the judge does.

[–] [email protected] 53 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's really a process of letting the subpoenaed know that they either tell the truth, lie and face perjury charges, or refuse and face contempt or court charges. The latter can seemingly land you in jail in perpetuity. Because fuck you, I guess?

[–] FederatedSaint 24 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Does the "right to remain silent" still apply?

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 year ago (2 children)

That's mostly for police. Once you're in court and ordered to testify, the person talking about germany is mostly correct. You can't be forced to self-incriminate nor testify against a spouse. Otherwise yes. Generally 99% of courts won't bother even asking the defendant to testify because self-incrimination is practically guaranteed. Usually only if the defense calls on them, which is often a bad idea.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

"Please state your name"

"I can't do that without incriminating myself"

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

Mr. Stealsalot,
We meet again

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I just talked about Germany because I didn't knew how it is in the US. Apparently it's exactly the same. Intresting comment

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[–] PunnyName 35 points 1 year ago (4 children)

What if you were coerced into testifying?

[–] [email protected] 66 points 1 year ago

Then you plead the 5th. Pretty sure that's exactly what it's intended for.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago

You mean by a court subpoena? If so then you testify or get found in contempt of court.

Or do you mean what if someone is threatened/blackmailed into giving false testimony? If that's the case then you should probably go to the police. If it's law enforcement who are coercing you then I suppose you could try to include that fact in the testimony, but there may not be much difference in that and refusing to comply with the blackmailer in the first place, in terms of your safety.

If you're coerced to lie under oath then I'd guess that still counts as perjury, but I doubt most judges would be mad at you for it; they'd shit fury all over whoever was coercing you.

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[–] aoidenpa 11 points 1 year ago (2 children)

If that's the best the judge can do, I feel sorry for them. And I will leave it at that.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 year ago

IDK, imprisoning a person until they either comply or the trial concludes without them seems pretty good for the judge. Bad for the person subpoenaed, but it's no skin of the judge's back

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[–] TheBat 99 points 1 year ago (3 children)

"Anything you say can be used against you in court."

"Titties."

"..."

[–] Leviathan 30 points 1 year ago

Held against you. It works much better with the proper wording.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Opportunity is not compulsion

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

In the movies they always say "... can and will be used against you"

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[–] Agent641 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The witness requests titties. Baliff, bring in "Big Mike"

[–] CurlyMoustache 15 points 1 year ago

His name was Robert Paulson

[–] [email protected] 91 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If this happens they'll do the "A person who swears to tell the truth and nothing but the truth says what" ordeal. If that doesn't work they will just let you leave

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 year ago

JUDGES HATE THIS ONE TRICK!

[–] [email protected] 46 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Judge: Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?

Me: Fuck. Here, I swore.

[–] [email protected] 49 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Also contempt of court. Do not pass go.

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[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My client has plead Oopsie Daisy, Your Honor. Case Dismissed (drops mic)

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[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 year ago (11 children)

Ok, serious question: what is the course here? Can you be forced to swear?

[–] [email protected] 34 points 1 year ago

Generally speaking, you will be asked to swear or affirm that you are going to tell the truth, and that you understand the consequences of not telling the truth. Whether you do a whole ceremony about it or not, it doesn't really matter -- but the court will want to know that you are competent to testify truthfully and that you know that you're not allowed to testify to things you know aren't true.

If you're asking "can you be forced to testify?", the answer is "Yes but it depends." If you're competent to testify and the officers of the court deem your testimony important, they can subpoena your testimony. If you have a reason to contest it, you can -- but "I don't want to" isn't good enough.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Not really. This is about ability, not willingness.

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Trump: "Yes."

Normal brain World: "Liar!"

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago

Trump: "No"

GOP brain world: "In my experience, no means yes..."

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I once crossed off something I didn't like on a contract and the boss scolded me and put a fresh new one in front of me while printing out yet another one.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 year ago (1 children)

All contracts are negotiable, you did nothing wrong other than not having a conversation before wasting paper, the main issue is that for most people the negotiation is "if you want to work here you have to agree to all this."

But yeah reasonable accommodation and mutual understandings, etc, should be written down and signed. I challenged the non-disclosure agreement at my job once because it literally said I couldn't talk about my work with ANYONE, and a plain reading of it would mean I'd be unable to even talk to my boss about what I was supposed to be doing. It was poorly written and probably unenforceable. My boss didn't like that so I signed it anyway and then focused on finding work elsewhere (he was a dick and his company got raided by the FBI a few years later)

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)
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[–] demlet 7 points 1 year ago

I've often heard it stated as a command: "Swear to tell the truth..."

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