this post was submitted on 17 Jan 2025
132 points (97.1% liked)

Food Crimes - Offenses against nutrition

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Welcome to Food Crimes! This community is here to collect all and any post about cursed food and generally unusual consumables.

Right now, here’s the rules:

  1. Posts must include an image or video containing food or drink.
  2. It must be unusual or cursed in some way. a. For example, something like Doritos Milk would be unusual, but normal milk would not.
  3. No AI posts whatsoever, and any images that were altered (Ex: Photoshop, Gimp) need to be tagged.

How to tag: To tag your posts, please prepend or append the tag name inside square brackets. For example,[OC] Foo bar baz or foo bar baz [Meta] would be acceptable. Multiple tags will require separate pairs of brackets, like so: [Edited][OC] foo bar baz

Here are the current tags:

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(BTW, I’m looking for someone to help mod here! I myself would not be enough if this community goes beyond a few posts a day.)

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[–] NegativeLookBehind 30 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Absolutely fucking amazing.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

I know right? Savory hardy candy... sign me right up!

[–] davidagain 5 points 2 weeks ago

I want this. I want it a lot.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 weeks ago
[–] njm1314 15 points 2 weeks ago

Hell I'm down

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Can't wait to freeze them and use them as ice cubes in my scotch.

[–] Cort 8 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Are you gonna do a clam Macallan chowder, or glenfiddich gazpacho, or maybe a chicken noodle blue label?

[–] EvilBit 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Chunky Beef Stewichladdich

Creamy Chicken and Brauchentosholli

Beef Ardbargley

Balveggie

Tomato Speysil

Italian Dalwhedding

Glenlentil

Macallaroni and Bean

[–] Cort 4 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Glenlentil

One more lentilagavulin

[–] EvilBit 3 points 2 weeks ago

Hearty Chicken Noodalmore

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

...i tried cooking fava beans with uigeadail once: it turned out f*cking disgusting...

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart 2 points 1 week ago

Hard clam chowder candy would slap!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

And just like that a thousand Scots picked up their sword and started walking towards your location.

[–] Nindelofocho 4 points 1 week ago

You can do this with normal soup though

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

Progresso is a food crime in any form.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago

I want methadone ones

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

Bouillon cube?

[–] Meron35 6 points 2 weeks ago

Would a chicken noodle soup candy be the ultimate cough drop?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

On the one hand, this is an actual crime.

On the other hand, the main reason I hate soup is the textural nightmare of having a liquid with squishy chunks in it, so technically still not as bad as actual soup.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

soup is overly diluted stew

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

Let me put it this way: if your waiter accidentally dumped that much water into your plate of stew while serving it you'd send it back.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

Always goes wrong at the dessert. Oh well, we'll get it eventually

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

These would be great to throw at people walking by on the street. THIS IS A FOOD CRIME