this post was submitted on 13 Oct 2024
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[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Honestly, I always engage in small talk. You can hate it but I see you on a regular basis and I'm always attempting to make a connection, one day we will connect.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

I mean, yeah? That's always been my relationships, I've only ever had pretty long-term ones.

Do y'all literally talk to your significant others about the goddamn weather or food every day?

Idk about y'all but in my current relationship I'd usually start with an in-depth analysis of some latest media I consumed or a geopolitical development, we'll be briefly reflecting upon developments in Palestine or Ukraine or UK politics or the latest on the US election while we share a couple Red Bulls and try new Elfbar flavours.

Sometimes this descends into a hearty debate on economics like whether increased taxation can raise the value of currency through demand creation (technically but it's not an effective measure), however eventually i will be pivoting into a technology I had learned about or historical context for some such, perhaps reflecting upon my cybersec exploits, relating to my independent study or my dayjob.

At some point she'd relate it to a material or technique she's been studying for her masters in material engineering, she'd remark on disliking inorganic chemistry, and we'd get into in-jokes, (latest being about Aerobiz 2000 for the Sega Genesis and my interest in the inner workings of an A320 and less than stellar business acumen) which will inevitably make us watch a video essay on YT or play a light game together like Life is Strange or HOI4 or even just listen to some music, later we'd order some Domino's Pizza and have some intimate times, a couple of nice sweet Barefoot wines and maybe a bit of Kinder Chocolate (not Bueno) for dessert later, we're asleep.

Sometimes we get nostalgic and talk about what life was like before we met on Tinder or talk about our future dreams, plans and aspirations.

I think smalltalk is okay when you're in a work meeting and you just want the coworkers to go away as soon as possible and let you get back to sleep, but I'd never date someone who is so socially inept that they would resort to smalltalk.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

And thus a healthy relationship wherein the individuals are mutually becoming smarter, with better norms, instead of increasing the normalcy of less intelligencegrowing conversation as their minds and norms deteriorate from it. Weird how it's the rarity.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

I tell jokes. I don't really do small talk. But, yes most conversations are deeply personal and deeply philosophical. I have lots of great friends, a lovely wife, a good job and fantastic kids. So yes, you can do just fine with almost no small talk. Become yourself, not what some unimaginative poster on the internet desperate for validation of their opinions thinks people should or shouldn't become.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago
Small talk stinks
Small talk stinks
See the young man in his new gown
Talking up to his bouffant drag
He says he loves you with flowers
Something that he's never had
A sentence should be like a serpent
Quick with a sting in its tail
        -bauhaus, Small Talk Stinks
[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago

I think no matter what we do most of the things are outoff our control

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago (4 children)

If you can question free will, you have free will.

[–] FlyingSquid 4 points 3 days ago

Or were you predestined to question it?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago

I'm a naturalistic determinist, I literally can't not question free will

[–] affiliate 2 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago

I love small talk. It's just noises that communicate emotion or very basic information, and it has a script!

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