this post was submitted on 16 Jun 2023
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Anxiety

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To preface, i do have some trauma, regarding two separate incidents that happened years ago and years apart, but since the last i have found it difficult to be outside sober without getting very anxious about my safety.

Walking past anyone, the potential of locking eyes or the potential of random people talking to me are things i worry about or become almost fixated on regardless of who they are and who im with. I cant just walk down a street, even busy ones without being hyper vigilant.

Has anyone ever gotten over this kind of anxiety? If so, how?

(Ive been to therapy and I've already processed a lot of what happened, but i still get this anxiety when leaving the house or just being outside in the streets)

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[–] Remyschnitzel 4 points 1 year ago

Hypervigilance is rough. I've been to various types of talk therapy and what has helped the most is somatic therapies - therapy that deals more with the body and processing emotions as they occur physically. People who have been through traumatic events often stifle what they are feeling, to the extent that often it can be difficult to even put a name to the emotion you're experiencing. I remember early on my therapist would ask me, "And where are you feeling this [pain/anger/sadness] in the body?"

When you're out and feel this sort of hypervigilance, try and remember that question. It helps rebuild those connections and gets rid of a lot of that floaty, anxious sort of feeling that comes from being ill at ease.

[–] m3t00 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

wear a hoodie and keep moving. certain areas are worse but walking with confidence makes you appear less approachable. got robbed 40 years ago. wrong part of town.

[–] Levii 2 points 1 year ago

Thanks for the reply, i actually walked outside last night after seeing friends and did just this and it did help calm my mind a bit!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I imagine you already have but have you tried sun glasses and headphones? I find the headphones usually give me an out of most conversations and even though sunglasses typically get me more looks I don't feel as awkward about making eye contact

[–] VubDapple 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

So this is called agoraphobia, literally "fear of the market space" but more colloquially, fear of being outside. Its frequently paired with panic disorder and in your case apparently with PTSD. I'm not sure I can tell you what to do to make it easier as each case is distinct, but the general thing that needs to happen is that you gradually expose yourself to the thing you fear for longer periods of time until your brain accepts that it is safe to do. Of course you want to only go to expose yourself to places where rationally you know it is quite safe even though the frightened part of you doesn't believe it. This is where your trauma needs to be taken into account.

[–] Levii 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Thank you for the reply, I do go outside, almost everyday actually, I see friends and everything. Sometimes i really dont want to, but do so anyway. But still cant shake this feeling, im super sociable, go to events for music etc. but when im just out, or at a bar, i cant help but have this feeling. Im still working on it I guess

[–] VubDapple 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It can help to treat that part of you which is super anxious like you would a frightened child you found yourself taking care of. Speak kindly to that part and see if you can gain their trust. See if there are others parts that criticize and ask them why are they doing that?

[–] Levii 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Sorry for the late reply, I dont go on Lemmy often enough.

I try to speak kindly to myself as frequently as possible, and rarely find criticism from within when it comes to these kinds of issues. I don’t think the issue is necessarily how I talk to myself. I dont really know what to do

[–] VubDapple 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Does being outside in some fashion remind you of previous traumatic events or do you think these issues might be more separate?

[–] Levii 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It does. Especially during Summer/Autumn.

My big fear isn’t about human interaction so much, though that is still present, it is more about the possibility of being attacked or robbed.

To add to that, I was pretty carefree with leaving the house and whatnot prior to these two experiences. I was even confident/raring to leave the house.

[–] VubDapple 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Well, it sounds like you were assaulted while outside your home and posttraumatic hypervigilance and panic you always fearing a repeat. There are a few ways to work on this sort of thing. If you can access therapy look for a provider who can offer EMDR which is a therapy that has the potential to take some of the terror out of the memories.

[–] Levii 1 points 1 year ago (5 children)

Thank you, I’ll look into EMDR. I may have to go back to therapy at some point then!

[–] VubDapple 2 points 1 year ago

Sure! What you're needing to happen is known as memory reconsolidation in the neuroscience literature. Essentially the idea is that memories are malleable and that under certain circumstances you can have the experience of remembering the terrifying event so that the memory itself is altered such that the awfulness of it is diminished. EMDR is one route to this effect. Good luck!