this post was submitted on 21 Mar 2024
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[–] [email protected] 25 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

Things necessary for it to be a good "Sims" movie:

1 Someone dies within the first 5 minutes from a wholly preventable fire.

1a) the other characters stand around for a few minutes staring blankly at the fire, then start panicking.

1b) no one calls the fire department because they're too busy panicking, and no one bought a fire alarm, so the house burns down.

2 Someone orders a pool to be built and forgets to buy a ladder, resulting in a character drowning because they refuse to leave without using a ladder.

3 At the beginning, none of the characters have any skill in anything whatsoever, resulting in them fucking up anything they attempt to do in a spectacular way, like setting the house on fire when trying to cook a meal.

4 The main characters live together in a home with one less bed than there are people living in the house, resulting in one person sleeping on the couch. However, no one ever calls attention to this.

4a) the "couch" roommate is the only one who is employed, the others simply live off their employed roommate's paycheck. This is also never addressed or acknowledged.

5 Someone inexplicably finds themselves trapped in a small room without any doors or windows.

6 Parent characters just kinda leave their babies wherever. This is demonstrated in a scene where a mother stops in the middle of the road, stares blankly into the distance for a moment, and then places their baby in the road before walking over to a Starbucks to get coffee.

7 At some point, twins are born. They immediately become orphans as both parents begin laughing hysterically and die (supposedly having twins can cause playful Sims to die from hysteria in The Sims 4).

Edit: basically, the only way for it to be a good "Sims" movie is if it's a non-stop train wreck from start to finish.

[–] Omegamanthethird 8 points 8 months ago (1 children)

6 is a little too dark of an example. But I like the thought process. I 100% assume there will be a meta element like The Lego Movie and Barbie where they will acknowledge a bunch of the stuff.

Also, I'm assuming that the ladder will be there and disappear. The Sims will then try to murder their creator.

Then again, that's been done before.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

Eh, Sims can't get run over (cars either stop for them, or pass through them harmlessly, depending on the game), so there's no real risk to the baby.

[–] Marcumas 14 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Guaranteed this will follow the new trope of characters in a video game becoming self aware

[–] [email protected] 7 points 8 months ago (2 children)

I feel like it'll be basically Barbie, but themed after The Sims.

[–] jacksilver 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I think a better approach would be flipping that concept. Do a Sims isekai like thing. Real person gets thrown into the Sims world and has to manage a bunch of idiotic Sims with their god-like powers.

Like the main character stumbles upon someone in their pool freaking out and drowning and they have to realize they need to add a ladder out of the pool.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

I keep thinking about the B story in Gamer, where like the "Slayers" FPS game Gerard Butler is in, his wife is in something like The Sims and it's just super fucked up, not least of which is because of the whole "someone else is in control of your body" thing.

[–] jacksilver 1 points 8 months ago

I was thinking more campy/comedy where the NPCs are kinda silly/idiotic like Sims and the Player/main character has to prevent them from basically killing themselves.

Although it does also lay up for something like a horror movie, where some god like hand randomly appears at times and just messes with people.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, after all.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

The only way I will watch this is if it’s spoken entirely in authentic Simlish.

[–] Pronell 10 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Remember, Hollywood is in trouble, executives are losing their homes, actors worry about being replaced by AI replicas...

And then this gets greenlit.

Get fucked.

[–] Son_of_dad 4 points 8 months ago

These are manufactured issues. Hollywood and now the game industry are doing mass firings etc, because they are trying to prevent unionization

[–] [email protected] 7 points 8 months ago

How many dlcs are we gonna have to buy to see the whole film?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

Please, no.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 8 months ago

I refuse to believe this is real omfg LMAOOO