this post was submitted on 29 Dec 2023
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Autism

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I will start: I bought myself a few interesting books and i found motivation to start learning more about computers.

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[–] BackOnMyBS 29 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

I found out I was autistic! That led to much insight, revelations, and was validating as hell. With this new info, I'm better prepared to adjust my life so that I can be happier and healthier. It's also pretty fun to start unmasking and engaging in my true-self. Additionally, it gave me a special interest to focus on, and I became a layperson-expert on autism.

I broke up and went no contact with my ex! While difficult at first, that turned out to be a major relief and pretty liberating. With this, I also started cutting out other people that were not good for me.

This community was established and flourished! This has helped me connect to a lot of other people just like me. While I still feel a bit lonely in my in-person life, I feel much less alone in an existential way. It's like thinking I was a weird alien all along, then finding out that there are a bunch of other people that are the same way. I'm not a weird alien. I just hadn't met my people yet. It also seems like it's creating opportunities to advocate for autistics, and I'm excited about that. Bonus: I left Reddit for good, which once I engaged here, I realize that place had stopped being a good fit for me.

I made an online friend that I occasionally play chess with! Sometimes they let me win, so I get to feel like I'm not terrible at chess πŸ˜‹

I went to Brazil! I had never been to South America, though I had seen it from the coast of Trinidad. I learned that I really like Brazilian people and culture. I also tasted the best bananas I've ever had in my life. The trip has kind of made me want to move to Latin America since I feel great around Latinos. However, being American and autistic, I have some reservations because I'm used to things being more precise and accountable than is generally seen in Latin America. I'm kind of hoping I can find a place that is a good mix of the two. I'm seriously considering moving to Puerto Rico at the moment, and have been having conversations with Puertos Rican I know to get a better idea on how that move would affect me. Bonus: I met a super attractive girl while I was in Brazil 😜, which helped me move on from my ex.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I also became aware that I'm more than likely autistic this year as well thanks to, of all things, the YouTube algorithm. I had a few ADHD folks I would watch, but then I got some AuDHD stuff popup and I really found myself suddenly going "Holy shit! I'm not just weird!" and really checking boxes. I took a bunch of the tests (I know not official, but they are also free NOT $$$$) and I tested in the "probably" category on all of them.

The best was I think the first video about Autism I watched was by a guy that has both ADHD and Autism and had a female guest to talk about signs of Autism in females. Anyway I was like "yep" to so many of the signs (even though I'm male) that it started me actually diving into my journey of self discovery, and suddenly making sense of so much of my childhood, and now adulthood. It's kinda a wild ride.

[–] BackOnMyBS 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Congrats! Welcome to the club πŸ™‚

I also went down the path of taking online tests, and they pretty much all said I was probably autistic. One in particular used terms that expressed certainty lol. Still, I had been misdiagnosed in the past with another mental health condition, so I shopped around and found an autism assessment that I could afford and felt confident in. Even though the assessment by a psychologist that is an expert on autism, 2 psychologist friends, and a separate therapist confirmed it, I still had some doubts that slowly went away. I still have the doubts here and there, but I feel comfortable with the identity. Being "non-autistic" my whole life, to then suddenly find out I'm autistic, has been a hard process to accept. It's not that I don't want to be autistic. It's more that I'm learning I'm something new that I never considered in the past. Basically, it's a major identity change that I guess takes its time to settle.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Yes, the adjustment is ... bumpy. I have crazy imposter syndrome, along with reflection of "what if" instances about my past had I known. Congrats on your diagnosis though!

[–] Dagnet 4 points 1 year ago

Pretty much what happened with me this year but with some small changes (cut contact with my sister for example)

Also, I'm from Brazil and you might like either living in SΓ£o Paulo ou a city in the south of Brazil. And yeah, girls here love gringos lol

[–] FollyDolly 20 points 1 year ago

I finally, finally got a decent used car. I didn't realize how much driving a 2006 shitbox affected my life until I got a 2018 toyota. Holy shit. I don't have to plan every trip to have multiple stops bc I can't afford to waste gas. I don't have to take my big winter coat and negative rated sleeping bag with me everywhere, all the time, because I don't have to worry about breaking down somewhere and having to wait for a tow truck.

I have a backup camera, which as someone who has always struggled with parellel parking is a GODSEND. I don't have to listen to the same CD on loop bc the radio actually works.

But the best part? The parking brake works. Now I can park on inclines! And the dash lights work too! No more using Waze at night to see how fast I'm going at night!

I feel like I've finally broken the poverty loop! (Well part of it anyway.)

[–] runjun 12 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

After Reddit pulled a capitalism, I decided to come here and more importantly read more. In the past decade I had read maybe 2 books. Now I have read a ton and I’m really happy to be reading as much as I did when I was a kid.

Here’s my list from June.

Waking Gods by Sylvain Neuvel

Only Human by Sylvain Neuvel

Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes

Shogun by James Clavell

Circe by Madeline Miller

The Secret History by Donna Tartt

The Player of Games by Iain M. Banks

I, Robot by Isaac Asimov

The Color of Magic by Terry Pratchett

The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle by Haruki Murakami

Annihilation by Jeff VanderMeer

Wool by Hugh Howey

Shift by Hugh Howey

Dust by Hugh Howey

Luna: New Moon by Ian McDonald

A Deepness in the Sky by Vernor Vinge

(Reading) A Fire Upon the Deep by Vernor Vinge

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Since Reddit pulled their capitalism and I joined Lemmy, I have come out of my shell more here, but also gotten a lot more reading done, and the time I do spend watching YouTube and other fun stuff is a lot better than it used to be since Lemmy got me back into Linux and the FOSS ecosystem, particularly Invidious and FreeTube.

So I have ended up spending less time on social media, but the time I have spent has been a lot more fun.

[–] runjun 4 points 1 year ago

The Linux and FOSS β€œpropaganda” on here is effective lol. I’ve swapped my laptop over to Linux and I’m close to swapping my server and main computer to it.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I finished my undergrad and got accepted to grad school. That's it. This year fucking sucks 😞.

[–] BackOnMyBS 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Congrats! What are you going to grad school for?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Electrical engineering

[–] Jozav 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My only hope is that the year is not over yet.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

After completely tearing my back muscles apart back in march, and being in sweet sweet pain for months. I decided to go back to school and embrace my nerd side.

I started college at 35 and also got accepted in university. I fucking love school (never would have said that at a younger age) and learning about computer networking and cybersecurity!

I also found love with a mother of 2 kids and it's been really great, she likes my nerd side and let me do my things :)

Getting bad injuries can really fuck someone up, and feeling depressed from it all is a legitimate reaction. Seeking help from a social worker (because the wait list for a therapist is insane) was a lifesaver. Talking to someone who is NOT a friend was so refreshing.

[–] SpaceTurtle224 2 points 1 year ago

a fellow tech nerd i see

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Figuring out I'm likely autistic. Don't have money to find out so don't know for sure, but a lot of things point to it. Other than that... I don't think anything else really.

[–] InvisibleShoe 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I started getting into gardening and trying to understand what being autistic means for me. Both good for the mental health and I dropped some weight πŸ‘

[–] SpaceTurtle224 4 points 1 year ago

Gardening requires a lot of patience and care. maybe i will plant a small plant to improve my patience.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

First long-haul trip in 4 years (US-Europe), more phones (currently over 80 IIRC)