this post was submitted on 18 Jan 2024
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Memes

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[–] [email protected] 62 points 10 months ago (3 children)
[–] dustyData 62 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

Money. Too much of it. We should help him, take away most of that money. That'll cure him.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 10 months ago (3 children)

I heard he has a love of ketamine

[–] Sigh_Bafanada 4 points 10 months ago

Hay now, don't saddle up the rest of us ketamine enjoyers with him. Neigh...

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

Can't blame him tbh...

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart 1 points 10 months ago

So did Matthew Perry.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago (1 children)

It seems he is trying to get rid of his money as fast as possible. I suggest he send me $2 billion to start so I can offload it asap. I would be his most valuable liability.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago (3 children)

shit I could spend 10b of his money in record time! gimme 24 hours

[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Would love to see someone actually try to spend 10b in 24 hours without nation level infrastructure.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)

honestly would be difficult lol

[–] Zehzin 1 points 10 months ago (1 children)

At what point does Amazon stops letting you buy things?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago

i guess well find out!

[–] Fosheze 2 points 10 months ago

Clearly you've never played genshin impact.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago (2 children)

You clearly don't comprehend just how much one billion is.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago

nah I'd just give 1b each to like ten charities and call it a day

I know I can't actually spend 10b lol

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

Thats like… three rtx 4090s right?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago (2 children)

The way I see it, Musk is only going to provide the investment if it fits into his investment portfolio strategy. With $2 billion, I would give $1 billion to charities, and the other $1 billion I would use to purchase as many American Southeastern coast beach houses as possible. I would sell the beach houses to climate denialists at half-off, instantly losing $500 million in the process. I'd keep the $500 million from the house sales to myself, because Musk knows that some money has to be kept to keep the lights on. The purchasers of the houses would slowly watch as their new investments into their houses literally goes into the ground (er, or oceans, as it is in this case).

I figure Musk can't resist an offer this good. My genius then continues to go unchallenged, except for Musk, who can somehow tank investments faster than this.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

The way I see it, Musk is only going to provide the investment if it fits into his investment portfolio strategy.

Well, and sometimes barely even that. He was desperately shuffling around capital trying to pony up when Twitter called him on his overly generous offer to buy the company. He simply didn't have enough liquid assets to do so.

[–] MumboJumbo 1 points 10 months ago

Don't do it! Flood insurance is cheap because it's subsidized by the US government. Those houses should be demolished.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 10 months ago

He gets high from huffing his own farts.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Things he knows nothing the fuck about. As per usual.