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I used to regularly listen to music a few years ago, this was something I was able to really enjoy no matter the situation. But then I got depressed and I just can’t anymore.
Spotify will suggest me a song and I’ll be like « hey I kinda like this one ». I’ll listen to it the next day and it’ll feel super repetitive, as if I had listened to it hundreds of times already and it got annoying.
Thankfully it doesn’t happen with situational music like in games and movies, so I can still enjoy that. I’m also still able to listen to the songs I really loved before I got depressed (I don’t do it much though, don’t want them to get repetitive too). New music tho… I can’t :(
This has been happening to me recently. It's like my patience for a piece of music has become wire thin. I'll flick from song to song rejecting everything before hearing something I think I might like and I do like it, for about 30s then suddenly I start to feel really irritated by it and bored and impatient like I want them to get to the point, but it doesn't make sense because there's not really going to be somewhere the music is necessarily arriving at, you're supposed to be enjoying the whole thing. I don't know what's happened to me. Hope it's temporary.
I do that when I'm looking for music that fits my mood, for me music is a functional thing so there is a point and a destination so to speak.
Maybe you just need to find the right thing for the moment.
Yeah, that’s exactly how I feel too!
Did you suffer some emotional trauma or something similar recently? It’s been 5 years for me, I don’t have much hope of it getting better anymore honestly, at least not if I don’t get better
Nah much more mundane. It seems to have coincided with me taking on a job where I'm dealing with lots of little problems popping up like wildfire that I have to rapidly respond to only for my efforts to be undone by a new disaster.
I've actually been doing pretty well at it, but it seems to have put me in a kind of "yeh yeh yeh whatever let's just hurry up" state of mind that is somehow leaching in to my leisure habits. It's like I'm trying to wrestle satisfaction out of the things I enjoy rather than just enjoying and appreciating doing the things themselves. Like, "I need to get X amount of pleasure units out of this thing before I have to go back to work and I just want to get it now in case something comes up, so can't we just skip to the part where I've already felt satisfied by hearing the song without having to actually sit around listening to it?"
Right I see. Do you intend to keep that job a long time? If it seems to change you that much, it doesn’t seem like such a great idea :(
It was supposed to be a short engagement that dragged on for some 2 to 3 times the expected duration. The last day, (one of several supposed last days should be this coming Monday).
I'm not too concerned about the impacts on my well being. If I was doing this for what I expected to be years I'd basically be demanding a lot of changes and I'd be personally taking on a lot of less of the burden of getting the ailing project over the line but given the expected short duration I've just been trying very hard to help get things underway and moving and also for the more selfish reason of kind of wanting a rest now.