this post was submitted on 18 Feb 2025
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Porn Iβm afraid. Starting as a way to combat boredom and loneliness and anxiety as a preteen has turned in to a fifteen year long struggle and descent in to various medications and treatments that only impede my ability to develop healthy intimate relationships. Nofap, yorubrainonporn, abstaining, none of it has been effective for more than three weeks of it. Even being a pen tester when the compulsivity hits, itβs me versus my skills. And itβs always a losing demoralizing battle.
I'm currently trying to quit that too. It's harder than I expected. I'm not severly addicted or anything but I've recently learned a lot about why porn is bad and why we should stop consuming it. The two aspects to it are basically the exploitation of the industry and the effects that watching it has on the viewer. If anyone's interested, I can also go into more detail on that. For the first reason it would be enough to watch porn that's not made using real people, like hentai but the second reason is why we should stop it entirely. It's just that I grew up with phones and the internet, so I've jacked off to porn since I was 11 and it's kinda hard to jack off without it because that's where my mind goes automatically. I should be able to just do it without having to watch anything but I end up just not doing it at all. I don't know if there's any advice or something that could help me there.
What is a pen tester? I'm sorry to hear your problems and hope you get better soon
I do red team cybersecurity. Basically I try and break in to systems. Putting blockers up in my place is always a challenge as I break through the, by sheer skill.