this post was submitted on 09 Jan 2025
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Wait, you don't poop first?
Wait, you don't poop during?
I waffle stomp all the time
I have a pre-existing injury that causes lots of pain in lots of contexts.
I've found that, especially recently, using the toilet greatly enhances the pain, sometimes to debilitating levels. Now I have to decide whether to use the toilet then shower, leaving me feeling clean but down for the count; or to use the shower then the toilet, leaving me at lower pain levels but feeling gross all day.
Neither seems like a good option. The best option I've found is to use the toilet, clean myself as best I'm able, lay down for a while, then shower; however, it can be hard to fit this in a work day or any day when I have obligations.
Now you know a bit more about me. It's your fault, you asked.
Spend $30 and buy a bidet attachment off of amazon you deserve better than your current painful poo regime.
While I appreciate that, I have a bidet. The source of my pain is the physical act of sitting in that position, rather than anything specifically related to the act or cleanup.
I've considered getting a squatty potty (or equivalent stool (heh)), but I'm not sure if that would make things better or worse.
We gotta design you a standing toilet or something
Haha, I don't think I've discussed my toilet habits as extensively with a stranger before.
The injury I mentioned was to one of my legs, which unfortunately means that prolonged standing also hurts. If something to change the position in which I sit doesn't help, my next step will be to replace the toilet with one with different ergonomics.
I do appreciate the thought!
edit: relieve/replace