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turkey
Never had a national bird, according to this article. Thank God our infinitely wise and useful government got on that before they lost all their power to actually do anything meaningful or helpful. 🦅🇺🇸
It's what Franklin wanted. And Franklin had humor and consistent set of morals. And got France to back us up by having sex with so many French women.
I think the Turkey would be better than a bird we have to ADR in the screech of another animal.
Turkeys: invasive, will absolutely move in and fuck up your shit
Bald Eagle: almost went extinct because it ran out of a particular type of tree.
Turkeys: will eat literally anything under the sun. Grass. Seeds. Other, smaller inferior turkeys. Car bumpers.
Bald eagles: almost went extinct because salmon was in short supply.
Turkeys: big, fat, aggressive birds with absolutely no fucks to give. The Always Sunny crew if they were all birds and not just D.
Bald Eagles: sleek, reclusive, and quiet. Literally sounds like a mouse.
It's turkeys, it was always turkeys. It's not even close.
It was hunting (considered pests) and DDT (pesticide that made the eggshells break too easily) that made eagles almost go extinct.
Chicken nuggets