this post was submitted on 12 Oct 2024
83 points (98.8% liked)

Ask Lemmy

26702 readers
2125 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions

Please don't post about US Politics.


Rules: (interactive)


1) Be nice and; have funDoxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them


2) All posts must end with a '?'This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?


3) No spamPlease do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.


4) NSFW is okay, within reasonJust remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either [email protected] or [email protected]. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].


5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email [email protected]. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.


Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.

Partnered Communities:

Tech Support

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Reddit

Jokes

Ask Ouija


Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu


founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

I write this with homemade maple jalapeno cornbread in my mouth, gifted to me by the bar staff at my local pub this evening. This is simultaneously the best and most unexpected thing I've ever brought home from a bar, my significant other excepted.

This got me thinking: what is the weirdest thing you've brought home from the bar, Lemmy?

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] Drunemeton 12 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (2 children)

Be me: out drinking with friends for several hours.

Be them: acting completely normal.

Be me: drinking makes you pee, so me go pee, many times.

Be us: we’re drunk! Having a great time.

Be them: still acting completely normal.

Be me: say good night and put on my leather jacket.

Be me brain: Damn I’m drunk cuz this thing feels like it weights a ton ! Stumble home.

Be me front door: watching the confused, bemused, astonished drunk reach for his keys and pull lemon after lime after orange out of his pockets, but no keys.

Be me front door glass: Watching him stuff them into his jeans pockets like a never ending clown car of NINE pieces of citrus.

Be me keyhole: Watching drunk-e-poo finally find his keys, and let himself in.

Be me: laughing and drunk and wondering what the hell’s going on…

Be them: laughing their asses off, wondering when I’d finally notice that every time I got up to pee they took whole bar garnish and put it in my pockets.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

This narration style is a bit tiresome