News and Discussions about Reddit
Welcome to !reddit. This is a community for all news and discussions about Reddit.
The rules for posting and commenting, besides the rules defined here for lemmy.world, are as follows:
Rules
Rule 1- No brigading.
**You may not encourage brigading any communities or subreddits in any way. **
YSKs are about self-improvement on how to do things.
Rule 2- No illegal or NSFW or gore content.
**No illegal or NSFW or gore content. **
Rule 3- Do not seek mental, medical and professional help here.
Do not seek mental, medical and professional help here. Breaking this rule will not get you or your post removed, but it will put you at risk, and possibly in danger.
Rule 4- No self promotion or upvote-farming of any kind.
That's it.
Rule 5- No baiting or sealioning or promoting an agenda.
Posts and comments which, instead of being of an innocuous nature, are specifically intended (based on reports and in the opinion of our crack moderation team) to bait users into ideological wars on charged political topics will be removed and the authors warned - or banned - depending on severity.
Rule 6- Regarding META posts.
Provided it is about the community itself, you may post non-Reddit posts using the [META] tag on your post title.
Rule 7- You can't harass or disturb other members.
If you vocally harass or discriminate against any individual member, you will be removed.
Likewise, if you are a member, sympathiser or a resemblant of a movement that is known to largely hate, mock, discriminate against, and/or want to take lives of a group of people, and you were provably vocal about your hate, then you will be banned on sight.
Rule 8- All comments should try to stay relevant to their parent content.
Rule 9- Reposts from other platforms are not allowed.
Let everyone have their own content.
:::spoiler Rule 10- Majority of bots aren't allowed to participate here.
view the rest of the comments
When I was a younger man I used to feel very uncomfortable around gay people, particularly gay men. I didn't "hate" them per se, but being around them made my skin crawl. This was a direct result of the environment I grew up in, and the lack of experience I had with actually getting to know gay people personally. Eventually once I made my way out into the world I was forced to interact with actual gay men and learned that they are just normal people, and my discomfort was entirely in my head, it was a product of ignorance and prejudice. I am glad to say I am better for having moved beyond that. At that time those feelings were a lot more politically valid, but that doesn't make them any less homophobic. What you are validating is the same. Trans women using female bathrooms pose no actual risk to those cis women (any more than other cis women do in female restrooms). I would bet that very few of those cis women vocalizing those concerns have ever actually been aware of sharing a restroom with a trans woman. They just imagine some hairy boogyman dressed in a dress saying "I have the right to use this bathroom" but that's in their head. It's not a valid fear, it's a phobia. They need to be educated, not coddled and told those feelings are valid. If trans women were actually assaulting or peeping on cis women using the restroom that might be different, but the fact remains women (cis or trans) are almost certainly much more likely to be assaulted in the women's restroom by a cis man than by a trans woman. You can't say you are not trans-phobic and still validate those baseless fears.
Kudos for sharing this. Hopefully others can learn from it too.
At the end of the day, I just want somewhere to relieve myself and maybe wash my face. The fear that women may have with a man in their bathroom is likely not related to actual use of the bathroom, but fear of assault.
This attack on trans people in bathrooms is just smokescreen to mask the problem that some men are fucking creeps who need to be called out. I think it was Huckabee who said he would've loved to be able to go into the women's locker room when he was in school, and I was fucking disgusted by it.
first, you have your terms backwards. Trans men were assigned female at birth and transitioned to male. They want to be able to use the men's restroom. You are discussing trans women's right to use the women's bathroom.
What does the physical size of some trans women have to do with anything? There are a lot of gay men who are bigger and stronger than me, if a "bad actor" wanted to sexually assault me, the men's bathroom would be the perfect place for them to do it. Should we ban gay men from straight men's restrooms because of some men would have that fear? No, and the reason is because it's not a valid fear, it's in my head (or was), it's not likely. Does that mean no gay man has ever assaulted a straight man in a restroom? Of course not, but it just not a realistic fear. It's in their head. It's a phobia.
Cis women who are uncomfortable sharing a bathroom with trans women are uncomfortable not because they have seen big hairy men in dresses eyeballing them in bathrooms, but because they are irrationally afraid of that. It's not a valid fear, because it doesn't happen. It's a phobia. Cis women are just as safe with a trans woman in the bathroom than they are with other cis women in a bathroom. That is an indisputable fact based on all actual evidence. Anything else is an irrational fear based on prejudice and ignorance and you are validating that. That means you are supporting transphobia right now, whether you want to admit it or not.