this post was submitted on 02 Aug 2024
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AuDHD

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A place for those that got both Autism and ADHD, those confirmed as one and are suspecting they got the other as well, and also everyone who is neither and just genuinely curious.

Since the combo comes with its own set of challenges, this shall be a place to ask for advice, vent, infodump about special interests and/or just vibe and meme.

Please be respectful. General niceness guidelines apply - formal rules will be added later if necessary.

In regards to medication and medical advice: Please take under consideration that this is only an online support community. Offered advice is always an expression of individual opinions or experiences and shall never be taken as substitute for a professional in-person assessment!

This is a SFW community. Sensitive topics are allowed, but must be properly labeled.

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Is this a common stereotype? I honestly have no clue. I've never run into it myself, but that doesn't really say much about how common it is

[–] TonyOstrich 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

It is almost the exact conversation I (autistic) have had with all of my non-autistic partners.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I've definitely had issues with rigid thinking and have had conversations (well, fights…) about it with my partners, but I think the reason that I've not run into this specific stereotype is that I'm completely OK with ambiguity which I guess is a bit surprising

[–] TonyOstrich 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Isn't that what he is pointing out in the video?

To me, and what I got from the video, everything is basically on a continuum and ambiguous. Nothing is ever absolute, it's just more or less likely.

That doesn't really play well though with the way most people are actually wired to benefit from "lying" (being positive, or reciting positive or affirming mantras) to themselves. I can't speak for any autistic person other than myself, but I personally find the exercise of finding the silver lining or reciting positive affirmations to myself to actually be harmful and upsetting despite knowing that research indicates it is a helpful thing for more neurotypical people. Neither group/person is wrong, they just interpret things differently through no fault of their own.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Oh yeah it was a part of what he was saying, although he seemed to be specifically also saying he's not comfortable with ambiguity and likes it when people "follow rules", which I took to be what some people refer to as "black and white thinking"

[–] TonyOstrich 1 points 3 months ago

Gotcha.

That makes sense. The way I interpreted the statement about following the rules was that although everything is basically shades of gray that needs to be analyzed and have probabilities assigned to, that's really tiring and taxing. When people follow rules (or more generally do what they say they are going to do) it removes the need to process and analyze what they are doing because they are operating within that predefined framework that is already understood.