this post was submitted on 12 Jun 2024
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Dude wipes are the most toxic masculine bullshit product I’ve ever seen. Honestly who the fuck buys that shit except the most fragile male ego in the universe
I liked the answer that I once saw here: "Real men do whatever the fuck they want." No one cares about this kind of judgmental assholery.
Real men have painted nails when their kids say it's time to paint nails
Yes, Real Men™️ fall for toxic masculinity marketing tactics. Real Men™️! Also, just your average mindless consumer regardless of gender but Real Men™️, too! Especially, Real Men™️!
Be Real Men™️
Agreed. Stop flushing wipes, none of them are "flushable". If it doesn't dissolve from light manipulation when wet, it's not flushable.
Bidet. Just get one. They're like $30 and take 10min to install. Clean buttholes forever.
I’m sitting on a fine $700 one right now and it’s heaven. My real office.
I can't even imagine what features $700 can buty you in a bidet.
Guess I was wrong about price.. it’s $850 but it’s the Toto S550e. Bought it two years ago and haven’t regretted it at all. I’m actually going to have an electrician come out to install plugs in the other bathrooms to put bidets in all of them.
The one I have now also sprays the front area for the ladies to I can’t comment on that but might be why it’s so expensive.
The seat heats, the water is warm that sprays, auto open… pretty much all you need. I will say that as a dude on the taller side (6’ 2”), I really have to scoot my ass forward quite a bit so I’d probably find something else for my next bidet.
https://a.co/d/8Xao9AX
Ah man, you've got a Cadillac.
I had me an old Panasonic model at my old apartment that wasn't as nice but goddamn if you set that MF to the strongest setting 🫨🫨. The thing would clean your ass, rectum and colon lol.
Ah that's a lot more features then even the nice hotel in Korea had. The instant heat and all the automatic stuff is probably why it's so expensive.
The second nozzle for vulvas is standard on even cheap models.
Bidets are great if you’re at home but if you travel you need something
I've tried to get them to install one at work, but they keep slapping that one down.
Have you tried toilet paper?
You really don't. Toilet paper does the job for 90+% of people, at least in the US.
And 90+% of the United States population walks around with shit on their ass. It's gross.
To be fair, a moistened wad or two of toilet paper works just as well as "flushable" wipes.
Fuck it unattended hose in someone’s yard
If it gets men to take care of themselves....I'm for it.
REAL MEN HAVE SKID MARKS
/s
I know a guy that said he doesn't wash around his ass when he showers because "that's gay as hell". I don't even wanna know what kind of biome he's got flourishing down there.
Sounds like the kind of guy that comes out of the closet in their 80's.
Turns out there are a lot of those people. They’re probably doing fine.
they're probably doing better with cleaner buttholes than if these didnt exist
Anything other than a bidet, bonus points for charging more for having more 'masculine' advertising
Not to go political but have you paid any attention to the number of supporters of the king of fragile male egos, their king? It's a huuuge market segment.
I buy them because they smell like mint. I prefer them over normal wet wipes. I didn't think this was such a passionate issue for people.
You also seem to be taking it really personally for some reason.
I buy the product, the comment attacks people who buy the product. I'm quite literally the target group. "For some reason"
Yeah same, I got ones that smell like Shea butter, they're pretty nice. I mean if the store had other ones branded differently with the same wipes I would just buy those lol. I feel like the only ones triggered by the imagery are ironically the guys who are insecure in their masculinity and feel threatened by a literal moist toilette.
when you have large hands and a large asshole that takes large messy shits, you need a larger than normal ass wipe. dude wipes is the largest asswipe on the market. no cap.
I’m a caregiver for a man who needs coaching through the entire bathroom hygiene process and I can say that in my professional opinion, Dude Wipes are terrible. They pull apart just getting them out of the package (see below), let alone when someone with dexterity issues tries to clean their butthole with them. He ended up with a poop covered hand after pulling the bits of pulled apart dude wipe out from his butt.
They are the largest “flushable” wipes, but are smaller than a normal baby wipe. Flushable wipes shouldn’t be flushed anyway, they’re terrible for every type of sewage system.
Fine, but now big gals with same need to buy “dude wipes.” Just call it heavy duty, or industrial strength.
Or Carl's jr EXXXTRA BIG-ASS wipes.
dude, cmon
They're larger than regular wipes, and the chemicals are less irritating. Compare to cottonelle wipes which make my down there burn, and the choice is easy. These days I prefer crocodile wipes though.
So then call them “XL wipes” and put a line about sensitive skin
Pass that along to their branding coordinators. No one here can do shit about what products are named.
We can do a little bit by mocking the branding mercilessly.
I’m just pointing out how stupid it is, you can contact their branding people all you want on my behalf!
Who’s out there wiping crocodiles?!