NonCredibleDefense
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"People who are different to me deserve to die"
A comment that really stuck with me was when someone said "How people treat furries is a great way of finding out what kind of person they really are."
Furries harm no one. In fact, they bring a lot of joy to a lot of people. At Toronto Pride the furries are one of the highlights of the parade. Kids absolutely love them; all these fun people in their animal costumes just out having a great time.
But it's considered socially acceptable to mock them. Even among self-proclaimed leftists. And that tells you that those people would mock you too, for being queer, or black, or trans, if not for the fact that they had built an identity for themselves around being "the good guy."
Find out how someone feels about furries, and you'll very quickly learn who are the performative progressives, and who are the real ones.
We might have seen the same comment, because a similar sentiment has stuck with me. I've found it very useful for self reflection because I am not a furry and I don't understand furries. My instincts tell me to be weirded out and judgemental of furries because I don't get it. I then consciously work to override that instinct because it's silly and it's actually much easier to not be an asshole about things. I am glad for anyone who has a hobby and a community that brings them joy and fulfillment.
Being attracted to anthropomorphized whatevers isn't even all that odd. I mean, have you ever played an RPG and romanced a non-human character? If you think Karlach or Garrus are hot, then what's the problem with thinking Lola Bunny or The Beast is hot? I don't really get the fursonas or the suits, but I also don't get the appeal of mashed potatoes, so...
A lot of people who identify as furry have a romantic/sexual fantasy world that is so far removed from reality that rarely are humans even involved in their stories and roleplay and artwork. They aren't out lusting after animals (mostly), they are imagining a world where sapient beings, are free and open with each other and not bound up in human hangups and prejudices and it's honestly quite nice, I seriously wish all the major fan-fantasy subcultures had a central theme of diversity and love that reaches beyond any physical form.
I think that furry sex stuff can seem very queer in this way. To clarify what I mean, as well as being the Q in LGBTQ+, I'm also invoking queer as in queer theory. For example, prominent queer theorist Eve Sedgwick says that queer can mean "the open mesh of possibilities, gaps…and excesses of meaning when the constituent elements of anyone’s gender, of anyone’s sexuality aren't made (or can't be made) to signify monolithically". Another less verbose definition, from Michael Warner (who I'm not familiar with, pulling these words from Wikipedia): "Queer gets a critical edge by defining itself against the normal rather than the heterosexual." (Source: Wikipedia article for "Queering")
The way that I think of this is that I'm bisexual because I'm attracted to both people of my gender and not of my gender. I'm queer because as a chronic punk, I relish the chance to leverage my bisexuality to challenge societal norms and assumptions — I got a hell of a lot cooler once I pushed myself out of the closet because it was fear around fitting into moulds that was driving a lot of my internalised homophobia. That's my personal take on the distinction between gay/bi and queer. Personally, I don't necessarily think one has to be LGBT+ to be queer, but that's a somewhat contentious opinion.
This isn't to say that all furries are queer, though I'm sure some people would argue that. Just that I think I think a lot of furry culture makes more sense if you're familiar with queer theory and queer culture.
This is all a long winded way of saying that there's a sense in which furries are punk as fuck, and coming from someone like me, that's an indication of respect
The way that I make sense of fursonas and fursuits is to just reflect on the various silly things I have done as part of my hobbies. I made a chainmail skirt/dress for a party a while back. It took many many hours and the result is great, but I mostly did it because I like having a project to work on, and the event I was making it for was a great opportunity for people to tell me about how awesome the new thing I made was.
I'm also friends with a bunch of LARPers (Live Action Roleplaying, for anyone who doesn't know — like Dungeons and Dragons, but with more hitting people with foam swords in fields). I'm not really into LARP myself, but I've been to a few because it's really cool when you know enough people that you feel a part of a community. A couple of times, I wasn't even playing, but helping out as crew, which meant putting up tents, ensuring everyone got food, helping put secrets into envelopes. LARP is one of those hobbies which is like, objectively weird (I say this with affection), but having existed in that sphere, the reason why most people do stuff is because they want to make cool shit that other people will appreciate, and they want an excuse to hang out with friends for a weekend in a field or a ballroom.
I find homeless people to be a better barometer. There's nothing cute about the guy living in a tent that smells like piss. But nine times out of ten it ain't their fault. Most homeless people were/are fully employed and just stopped being able to pay rent because of the price increases, wage stagnation, medical bills, etc. Then, once they're homeless there's little to no public facilities for them.
Yet you find some of the most committed liberals saying we need to "just get rid of them". Yup, fall out of capitalist society and suddenly the final solution is okay with those liberals.
At the same time there were a lot of homeless charities do actually tell you that it's better to donate to the charity than is to the homeless person. Because they will just spend the money (obviously) whereas the charity can actually enforce change they can make use of the money in ways that will help more than just one person.
Of course the real thing to do would be to get into politics and actually affect political change but that's difficult because politics has momentum like everything else and it's difficult to get it to radically change stuff quickly.
You have to be careful of charities that say they're forcing the person to change for their own good. Often they do more harm than good. It is true though that soup kitchen charities can stretch a dollar further.
A lot of people who claim to be leftists or progressives are literally exactly the same as the outspoken, radical racists and bigots.
In that they both are utterly disconnected from reality, they both are attaching to a "side" because of a sense of moral superiority and community belonging. They both ridicule and ostracize people who are different. They all have the same desire to connect with a storyline or narrative, they just have chosen different characters to follow, a different side of the WWE Wrestlemania arena. But it's still all Wrestlemania theater. The fundamental emotional engagement is the exact same thing, minus the red hats.
This isn't to say "both sides bad durrr durr blah blah fart fart" because we absolutely have to spread progressive ideas and advocate for personal freedoms and rights and protections, but we have to be a lot less hung-up on weird purity-testing culture, on trying to make everyone fit your own image of what a "perfect citizen" should look like. You have, have, HAVE to start learning to be around people who are not only different, but you may not agree with. This is profoundly hard for the left and right, but I am challenging the left to be fucking better about being kind and understanding of others.
I think it’s more the strangers with candy scenario. Even toddlers go through a phase of stranger danger. It’s human nature to some extent.