ZenGrammy

Please keep all replies on topic. People should be able to have a discussion about the term without devolving into personal attacks.

I'm sorry you're finding job hunting so difficult. I tried for about six months to market my services as sort of a consultant/assistant and though I knew I was more than capable of doing the work, finding someone to actually hire me was very difficult. I ended up taking a job with an agency that did the same work in order to bridge the gap a bit, and after I was done with that job I returned to traditional work because I decided that the "marketing yourself" part of freelance work was not for me. It's difficult to even find a job because there are so many applicants for every position. For a traditional in-person job it's not so complicated.

When I decided to go back to work I used a temp agency. I think it's a good idea for you, as long as the person who is working with you understands your limitations. Here's hoping they have something available that is flexible and has fun and understanding people at the worksite. It sounds like you could use a win, and a confidence boost.

Yes, it's a little confusing when you read the instructions, but if you type a few letters of your home state or country in the search bar, it will start searching and then you can click the right state/country, and see the list of resources. It had quite a few in the few places I tried out just to see how it worked.

I sort of felt the same about my parents before I really did some reflection on who they were as children and how they were raised vs. how they raised me, and even how the generations before them handed down patterns of abuse that they worked hard to stop in their parenting of my siblings and me. It doesn't mean that everything was perfect. They still made mistakes that I can see as an adult who has raised children, but they also didn't have the benefit of all the knowledge I have now due to advancements in psychology and the decent education they didn't afford themselves because they were very young parents, but made sure I got.

Now, when I look back at who they were as people and parents I can see that they were not the best role models I could have asked for, but good people in their hearts, who tried to make sure I didn't suffer the same sort of childhood they had. My childhood was still not easy but it was better than what they had experienced because all they had to learn from were negative role models, too. We're all doing the best we can with the information we have.

If you try to frame it as everyone making small bits of incremental progress away from those bad role models with each generational shift, you can see the progress you have made, and that your parents made from their bad role models.

I am glad you will be going to therapy soon. Journaling and meditation will probably help you to work out your thoughts on tough topics while you are waiting, too. I started a therapy journal while I was waiting, where I wrote down what had happened that had messed up my life enough that I needed therapy. It was helpful for both me and my counselor.

I enjoyed this speaker and the different take on slowing our anxious thoughts down. I'm glad I found it later at night, when I don't have time to fall into a twelve-hour Ted Talk rabbit hole like I usually do when I come across one of these videos. Thanks for posting!

It sounds like maybe it's time for you to see a pain specialist if you haven't already done that. Mine are amazing. They help me manage my meds and any follow-up testing I need, and also work on hunting down the cause of any new or existing issues that could be managed by them. It's so frustrating when it feels like your doctor doesn't understand your pain, and a good pain specialist will not make you feel like that.

I have read some articles from chronic pain specialists saying that it's possible what your doctor is saying has some truth to it, because long-lasting pain can cause changes to your brain that make you feel pain even after your original injuries have healed. I thought that was happening to me, and my doctors probably did too, but I had nerve testing done and it turned out I have a pinched nerve that hasn't been addressed and it is somehow causing my body to experience pain at much higher levels than it should, and I tense up and become a ball of muscle spasms. The human body is so strange.

We have a lot of chronic pain sufferers in this community. You are welcome to join us. It's definitely difficult to manage and detrimental to your mental health, but I don't think your doctor was saying you are crazy. I think they were saying your brain is causing you to feel pain that you shouldn't technically be feeling so strongly anymore, so the problem is still real, but neurological now.

That was a good one. I married my husband even though he was blatantly honest like that when he got nervous or stressed out at first. Once I realized he probably has some undiagnosed ADHD and talked with him about it he at least became more aware that not everyone blurts out their thoughts like that. Now we joke that he is just an out-loud thinker and make space for it in the relationship. He only has to work on masking it at work if he wants to become friends with people there, and not have people angry that he said something critical of them all the time, not with me. I can ignore offhand remarks that are just him thinking out loud for the most part, or ask him if he really meant to say that or was just processing an emotion and maybe we should revisit this later.

I have basically the opposite issue. I have social anxiety and constantly overthink every interaction Even on the internet I agonize before hitting the post button about whether people really want me to say that. I retreat inside my head to process my big emotions before I present them to anyone, and I can't imagine what it would be like to just blurt them out all the time with no filter. Not that I am completely immune to that, but when I do I am horribly embarrassed by it. It seems like my own personal version of Hell to not really have the safety of processing things inside my head before I blurt them out. I think that's why I can have sympathy for him when he says something that seems mean or critical. It's not like I never have critical thoughts of my husband, I just have the safety of only letting them out when I feel it's important to do so.

It's tough when you have little ones in the house and everyone tends to get sick in batches. Make sure you are getting as much rest as possible and disinfecting the house as much as possible so you won't all pass the same illness around over and over.

I appreciate it.

Showering while sitting down is really nice, but have you tried a lovely, relaxing bath? It's even better. If you have a tub and don't hate the very idea of baths, I highly recommend it.

Hi there! Thanks for posting in YSK. It seems at the moment, this post is coming across as less than accurate. Will you do me a favor and update it to include the fact that accreditation is not the same as traditional colleges and the estimated prices that were found in the Wiki? That way it won't get reported and possibly removed.

OP has received their answer, and I don't think it would be productive to continue this discussion here, so I am locking the post.