ADHD

I've found my ADHD is more difficult to deal with later in life. It is not because my symptoms are worse, it's more because my responsibilities have grown. More and more of my goals are longer term issues that require constant attention over long periods of time and following through with plans in a timely manner.

I also feel that medication has exacerbated my hyperfocus on things unrelated to my true goals. I get by just dealing with the high stress times that occur when things have been procrastinated long enough to become urgent.

I don’t think that ADHD “gets better” when people grow up. I think that life and circumstances change, and change affects ADHD. But this is a problem with neurodevelopment and brain chemistry, it doesn’t magically go away.

That being said, it sounds to me like you might not be medicated. That’s ok, if that’s your choice, but know that medication is the single most effective treatment for ADHD that exists right now. On its own, it’s not enough, but without it, shit gets real. Dr. Barkley has some great informative videos that really help to explain how ADHD works in our brains, and the role of medication. So. In that regard, I suggest you reach out to your doctor.

Smaller things that might help though, I always find that if I really need to concentrate, or if I really need to get something done, voices distract me (podcasts, videos, anything where someone is talking). So, I will listen to music instead, particularly music without lyrics. Lo-fi works well for this for me, or piano music, or whatever. I just try to keep the lyrics (voices) to a minimum, and it seems to help.

Something else that helps when I really need to focus is a fidget toy in one hand (give your mind monkey a banana) while I read/learn/concentrate. It’s such a small thing, but it helps SO MUCH!

Good luck, hopefully these work for you!

Something that was suggested to me, by my therapist, is a book called Scattered Minds by Dr. Gabor Máte. It is well researched, and ultimately it provides long term solutions. Getting through a book in your current state, may not be ideal. But you may find an audio book version easier.

For now, you need to do things that will help you now. Firstly, make sure you are doing things you enjoy, and getting time to rest, and relax. If not, you will default to instant gratification. I know, because I am the same. When I am tired, overworked and overwhelmed, my ADHD gets very bad. A week ago, I was in a terrible state. I made so many mistakes at work, I was worried it was going to cause me to lose my job. After this week finished, taking time to recover really helped me.

Also, maybe try doing some exercise. For now, just start small. Maybe limit the time you spend doing the activity, to avoid overdoing it. For any new habit, starting small is very important.

You may also benefit from this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fH7N9YRxMYc

Go for walks, take breaks from your study, when you have time, and just take a walk around your neighbourhood. If you need stimulation, you could listen to music, or a podcast you enjoy. Personally, I sometimes find it very helpful to take myself away from anything that will trigger an instant gratification loop. But ultimately, going cold turkey isn't the answer.

Right now, don't focus on huge strides, like not watching YouTube, or not listening to podcasts. Focus on taking time out in small amounts to just be present with yourself, how you feel and just trying to be aware. Honestly, even doing this for 2-3 minutes is really good for you. If you need something to guide you through doing something like this, you could try Medito. It's a meditation app by a nonprofit. The daily meditations can be done in whatever time period suits. I think the lowest is 3 minutes. But 3 minutes is still a good effort. You need to reward yourself for every small win. Going for a new habit that is monumental, and will only discourage you, and take away what motivation you have.

I can suggest more, but I am hesitant to do so, because too many things at once, when you're already struggling might overwhelm you. I hope you get something from my suggestions, and that you feel better soon. I know how hard and difficult it can be sometimes. You can do this. : )

You sound over worked. Try:

• isolating yourself in a library with no internet (turn your phone off)
• do this for an hour or two
• then go on a walk or go get lunch. Something fun and easy but not technology related

And finally (this is the most important step) observe how you naturally react to this pattern and adjust accordingly. You have to learn to outsmart yourself which is the hardest thing you’ll ever do

There’s a theory that it doesn’t get better with age for anyone but many learn coping and masking mechanisms.

But yeah unfortunately what you’re describing is not rare. What you’re describing sounds an awful lot like you might be burning yourself out by the end of the day using all of your energy focusing on school and your internship.

If you aren’t medicated that would likely be the first place to start. I know everyone hates hearing diet and exercise, and they absolutely aren’t the cure some claim, but for myself at least they are a vital component of a holistic treatment. I need a combination of stimulant medication, healthy diet, regular exercise, sufficient social interaction, decent sleep, consistent habits, and the proper rest in order to be my best. Some of these can be trimmed with minor losses, but meds are bare minimum to function, and diet, exercise, and socialization are the difference between “can work then break down at home” and “actually function in my home life”.

I know it can be daunting and I just flat out couldn’t do it at times in college. My senior design project wasn’t going to sit around for me to go on a bike ride. But when my brain got fuzzy walked a lap around campus. Put on a podcast and move your body. And most importantly this isn’t all or nothing, this is every bit helps, and you can use that help to get another bit. Healthier food (like peanut butter on whole wheat for lunch instead of take out or ramen) may give you the energy to take a walk. Regular walks might give you the energy to go out with friends for an evening. These are habits and it took me most of my 20s to figure out and implement this.

Are you getting treatment? That's your first step, it can be very difficult to keep on track if you're flying solo.

You’re probably addicted to YouTube. It’s easy dopamine. ADHD brains seem to crave it. Sounds like you need treatment if the medicine isn’t cutting it. I find physical activity helps me the most. I get addicted to that too but at least I’m not on YouTube all day (I’ll save it for downtime at night as a reward).

At university, I medicated heavily with “the hard stuff” - stimulant medications. These took a heavy toll on my body; I had nervous tics and twitches galore. The meds gave me enough focus to develop good study habits and after 2-3 years I ceased them.

Once I joined the workforce, I focused on doing things that I was passionate about. For me, ADHD doesn’t always mean lack of focus; I can hyper focus when I’m motivated by something. Having a job that I liked to do turned me into a low grade workaholic (too much hyper focus!) but I became successful in my career.

For the past few years, I’ve been medicating with a non stimulant that I tolerate very well. I still do what I love, at work, and Strattera helps me stay focused on doing the things that are most important to my employer and myself, but my days of being a workaholic are over.

If you are like me, then doing what you love is essential, and finding the right medication is a big help, though not strictly essential.

You should not jump to any conclusions, procrastination does not directly mean that you have ADHD or ADD. The diagnosis should be made professionally through tests by a psychotherapist.

If you are diagnosed with ADD you will need a very individual treatment. This usually consists of behavioural therapy that should be supported by medication. With the help of medication you build up routines (like brushing your teeth, which you have probably already established and do not forget, despite ADD) that ADD does not prevent you from doing because they have become a habit. This is very individual and has to be repeated every now and then when life circumstances change.

In addition, depth psychological treatment is useful to deal with depth psychological problems that may have arisen due to the untreated and undiagnosed ADD (depression, anxiety disorder, eating disorders, etc.).

And even then, ADD may prevent you from doing certain things. For me, for example, studying just didn't work out, that's something you can accept and be OK with. Someone with an IQ of 80 can't study, just like a wheelchair user can't run a marathon, no matter how much they want to. So it may also be that ADD means that studying doesn't work for you either. This is not meant to sound demotivating but sometimes it is better to focus on your strengths instead of trying to compensate for your weaknesses.

And to answer your question: You never grow out of ADD. It is a congenital predisposition that can occur in various degrees of severity. To be precise, it is an adaptation disorder that makes it difficult for you to adapt to new life circumstances because it affects your sense of time, your perception of time, your reward centre and your ability to filter and prioritise external impressions.

In this scenario, I adjust or change my medication.

You can, and should, implement changes to your life to make it more structured and easier. But doing that often requires that you're already in a good space. That's where the meds come in.

Mine got worse as I aged. So I relied more and more on coping mechanisms. eg. timers, alarms, note apps etc. And I had to learn how to work within the confines of ADHD eg. instead of forcing myself to do a large task, I chip away at it until it is eventually done. I train my ability to come back to a task rather than try to force myself to focus significantly longer than my brain would prefer to do so. This makes it easier to force myself to start tasks as I know that the bar is to work on the task for a doable amount of time not necessarily to complete the task in one go