sleepmode

Prob fake but imagine spending a lot of time trying to form a friendship with someone and in the end you find they were only trying to fuck the entire time.

My aunt did hostile takeovers and her husband was even more rich. Their kitchen was bigger than my entire house. And that was their vacation house. I couldn't appreciate most of it, I was just a kid. But I remember my cousin had a pool in his room.

Because we remember when they made good games and had several good IPs. Some are still classics. There also weren’t micro transactions or having to sign into their stupid portal or needing to be always online or the shambling corpses representing the sad remainder of their IPs trying to trigger our nostalgia. They made good shit. It was innovative at times. A respected studio. Now they are simply an example of chasing the dragon.

I like the utility feed hanging off the front of the house going straight through the roof and blocking them from installing the other fake shutter. I wonder what other construction horrors lurk inside.

Parents were really into hot wings. They kept ordering them hotter and hotter. It got to the point where my eyes would water being in the same room as them, and I have a high tolerance for spicy food. However, I don’t enjoy the texture of wings and usually got something else, and I remember commenting that this time they smelled “off.” My nose is sharp and something smelled unmistakably rotten. They brushed it aside saying it was probably just the new nuclear fission burn the hair off your tits tropical fuck storm flavor or whatever goofy name they were newly trying out. I was feeling nauseous from the odor so I took my food to my room while they plowed through the pile occasionally pausing to exclaim I was missing out.

I woke up to one of them crashing their way through the house to the bathroom in a blind panic. The door slammed shut, the fan whirred to life and I could hear muttering, gasping and cursing and then the lovely sound of their body forcibly ejecting chicken from both ends. “Goddammit what the hell.” And then a request for a bucket. Stepdad staggered out looking pale as a sheet. “I think I need to go to the ER. Feels like I have knives in my stomach.” My Mom hadn’t succumbed yet, it hit her while she was in the waiting room after she drove him there. They were sick for about a week from salmonella and I was freed from their trufflepig chicken snarfing noises for about a year.

Lemmy vaguely feels like Reddit when it wasn’t really popular. When you could comment and it wouldn’t be buried under 10,000 others. Participation almost feels pointless there.

They jumped the gun releasing without a campaign at launch. People were merciless in reviews about that. It’s better since that was added but still feels a bit hollow. I hope this isn’t a mistake because it has potential and seems like it’s evolving quickly.

It works. Ask how they’re doing. Ask what they did last weekend. Compliment their clothing or whatever. Smile at them like you’re happy to see them. They don’t know what to do half the time and it’s hilarious.

Had to do similar for a micromanager that thought I was lying about my start times. He started calling asking where I was seemingly randomly. Then I saw him driving around one day in the lot swiveling his head around and realized he thought I was clocking in from home. (At the time I’d been occasionally parking about a mile away and hoofing it so my fat ass could get steps in before work. I explained this but he didn’t believe it).

So from then on if I didn’t feel like exercising I’d mark my arrival and hide my car somewhere in the lot behind trailers, a big dumpster, etc. and watch him drive around searching trying to catch me out. Then I’d see him find my car and shake his head. He knew what was up then. He stopped stalking my calendar and me after a couple days of that.

They’re also assholes as customers. Worked for a company that did monitoring for them and they were an absolute nightmare to deal with. They were so demanding of our time and liked to wave around legal threats so often that eventually management shelled out for a consulting company (who were SMEs with our product) just to manage their install.