Feel bad for the atlassian programmers right now.
You should feel bad for their support, which made very unwise decision and stayed operational...
this post was submitted on 13 Sep 2023
390 points (98.5% liked)
Programmer Humor
32595 readers
1855 users here now
Post funny things about programming here! (Or just rant about your favourite programming language.)
Rules:
- Posts must be relevant to programming, programmers, or computer science.
- No NSFW content.
- Jokes must be in good taste. No hate speech, bigotry, etc.
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
I bet it's only green, because you can still reach their web portal. It doesn't check any throughput. Or it does and it's green because a fuckton of tickets get created and instantly closed with "known error, check status page for updates".
Hey you can't use Jira, means you can get some real work done
Programmers are probably chill af, looks like a very bad day for some network people though.
Yeah, I was thinking DevOps, not programmers.
"Thank you for calling the development team quick response hotline. Please leave a message and we will relay it to the networking team as soon as possible. Seriously, it's probably a network thing. It works on our machines. You should call networking directly next time. Please hold and you will be transferred automatically." /s
A status page that acknowledges service failures?
Is this a new concept? I have never seen anything like it.
It's a product that Atlassian is selling: https://www.atlassian.com/software/statuspage
Not to be confused with their statuspage for their services: https://status.atlassian.com/
Or the status page for their status page system (which apparently has an ongoing incident): https://metastatuspage.com/
It's probably a bug. I've seen it before when an update broke the CDN that loads the green "everything is fine" icons. /s
RUN, BE FREE! You can escape their tracking now. They will never find you in the forest, eating nuts & berries.
Why does this happen so often currently? Atlassian is so unreliable, we are not able to work efficiently because of them having problems like once a month
Ah the classic. Firing the people you need the most in emergencies
What's this?!? The consequences of my own action?!? Who would have guessed?!?
That doesn't explain the last several years of instability.
I'm glad my org hasn't been forced into their Cloud crap yet.
What does your company use?
Because I seriously don't have a problem with their tools.
And Hell, a system outage in my company just means we goof off for a few hours.
On-prem stuff. Which is weird because we are apparently full speed into Office 365, Microsoft cloud auth, other crap
Using Atlassian stuff is already a hassle. It’s probably a feature to not have it work at all.
Have you tried turning it off and back on again?
What happened? I'm on vacation and out of the loop
Some users are unable to login to cloud products.
And that's why sometimes on-premise is better.
I remember when we went from on-prem to cloud jira. Less features, lot slower.
Just as today my brother went on a 30 minute rant on how terrible Jira and Confluence are. Hmmmmm...
Oopsgenie