this post was submitted on 25 Jan 2025
348 points (96.8% liked)

Funny

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[–] [email protected] 54 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Instructions unclear: stuck hand up pussy and got voted in as President

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Ummmm .... sir ..... Mr president sir ..... that wasn't a pussy

[–] edgemaster72 4 points 2 weeks ago

Doesn't matter ~~had sex~~ got elected

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

instructions unclear: lost the hand

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

Y'know, you should consider yourself lucky.

You don't encounter vagina dentata every day.

[–] Tylerdurdon 27 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

This is way off. Everybody knows the best way is to tell her to calm down. If it doesn't work the first time or seems to have the opposite effect, just do it again. Keep doing it and she will eventually stop.

[–] rovingnothing29 18 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Don't forget to point out that they're being irrational.

[–] The_v 3 points 2 weeks ago

And ask if it's that time of the month.

[–] spankmonkey 5 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Works on men too!

With men make sure to point out that they are scaring everyone by showing any emotion other than feigned happiness. Women aren't threatening enough to need the extra step.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

I like to go for sexual advances. Still working on the specific lines, but I'm sure to find a winner soon. ;)

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Wrong. You hold a bag of Tacos in her face and say very firmly and confidently "The power of the Mexican Gods compells you, Evil Spirit. Leave this woman's body!"

[–] shalafi 15 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

Dammit, beat me to it haha