this post was submitted on 17 Nov 2024
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] Gumbyyy 12 points 2 hours ago

FAKE! Obviously no self-respecting Apple iPhone user would own a Windows PC. Gotta keep it all in that walled garden, baby!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 hours ago (1 children)

troll. no one uses Norton anymore, its all about avast.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 hour ago

Is my McAfee not cool anymore?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 5 hours ago (3 children)

prepares a morning shower

??

[–] Quadhammer 3 points 18 minutes ago

Wall mounted mechanical dildo obviously

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 hour ago

this was written by someone pretending they know how showers work

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 hours ago

HAL begs anon "please take a shower"

[–] EldenLord 62 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

No wait, you're telling me that mega-corporations don't care about me getting good products and having sole ownership of my personal data?

B-but [sponsored tech-geek blog], [generic gaming-news outlet] and [irrelevant apple shill] only ever told me so! Are you implying they lie to me?

Realtalk I only use cracked win11 pro workstation and iPhone because of work, every telemetry possible disabled (god bless the EU).

[–] [email protected] 26 points 15 hours ago

I have a trash internet connection so I just play whack-a-mole with internet privileges. Windows update? No. NVIDIA? Not a chance. Google? How is that even on my computer? But also nah.

Turns out most things use fuck all resources without internet

[–] [email protected] 21 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

For real, though, I'm building a Hal9000 system for my home built on top of Home Assistant and Esphome.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

What kind of hardware are you using for voice controls/voice output? Been looking to build an Ai waifu to control the lights.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 22 minutes ago

I'll have to dig through my receipts to see. The Hal project has taken a back seat to the microchip controlled pet feeding stall project.

[–] perviouslyiner 71 points 17 hours ago (2 children)

Google a recent medical symptom - your smart watch already knows the gritty details

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 hours ago

...But my smart watch is local sync only through FOSS alternative app. Maybe it's a normally intelligent watch instead of a smart watch.

[–] sylver_dragon 56 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

It's always cancer.
Sore throat - cancer.
Back ache - cancer.
Tiredness, cough, loss of taste and/or smell - maybe COVID. But also, cancer.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

In its defense, the symptom I googled most recently like a year and a half ago, did, in fact, turn out to be cancer.

Yes, I'm fine now. But sometimes it's right.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 hours ago

Doesn't take away the fact you should've asked a doctor instead of a search engine, though.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 17 hours ago (4 children)

On that matter, why is Norton antivirus so popular? I don't remember being prompted to install one when installing Windows, yet I've seen a lot of people with it.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 hours ago

It just comes on cheap prebuilts or laptops. It sucks.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

Back in the day, you were pushed hard to either put McAfee or Norton on your computer when you bought one from Dell, Compaq, etc. A lot of older people still think you need to do that so it’s still pretty popular.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

I always used kaspersky which I stupidly downloaded from a torrent lol. Guess it worked? I'll never know tho.

[–] kautau 11 points 14 hours ago

It protected our computer perfectly :)

[–] radix 43 points 16 hours ago (3 children)

Back in the day, Norton actually made some useful tools. They've been coasting on that 90s reputation for decades, though. It's all unnecessary bloatware now.

[–] criss_cross 2 points 3 hours ago

There's still contracts that force anti-virus on servers and desktops so that may be their other source of revenue

[–] [email protected] 11 points 12 hours ago

Dos was so much easier to use with Norton Commander.

[–] Tash 8 points 15 hours ago

You gave me flashbacks of the Peter Norton and John McAfee days!

[–] [email protected] 29 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

It comes preinstalled in a bunch of laptops.

[–] shneancy 31 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

strange, most IT professionals will tell you the only thing you need is Windows Defender and an ability to think before clicking strange download buttons

[–] [email protected] 17 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

Not strange, most executives will sign a deal where another company gives them money for every laptop they sell with that company's product preinstalled.

[–] shneancy 3 points 9 hours ago

ah of course, money

[–] SomeGuy69 11 points 17 hours ago

beep boop "You're wrist circumference is too wide and the tracker noticed no physical activities."