My company finally is asking politely that we have to go to the office twice a week. Or else. That else is not yet defined, but obviously there will be consequences of not going to the office.

I have been at this company for 15 years, from junior dev to manager.

I did a daily commute of about 40 mins in the morning, 40 to an hour back, never gave a second thought about that. That was normal.

After pandemics, I found out all I have been missing on my kids growing up. My second kid is much more attached to me since she saw me daily, even if I was in my office room at home, she got to see me more often.

So I found out how much my life improved by doing working at home. Hell in the middle of this sentence my kid just showed me some thing she drew.

I stood my ground, I basically politely told HR that I am not going back. And actually my reasons make sense, I work with people in other countries, they don't care where I am.

And it will affect my performance, driving to the office, moving all my equipment, and having people around trying to talk to me will take a toll.

So yeah, I am polishing my resume, because there is no turning back now. I will be shunted if I ask for a raise, they can easily say "hey but you are not coming to the office, how come you want a raise if you are not part of the team", never mind that I do everything that is expected and more.

Just off my chest I guess, and anxious about the future.

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[–] FailBait 5 points 1 year ago

I’ve been working from home for 12+ years and I can honestly say I wouldn’t want to work in an office. It would take a very very large number to make me consider it.

Commuting, having to buy “work clothes” etc, adds up. It’s time and money I don’t need to spend.

There was a brief period my boss tried to force us into the office. However anyone I would have to talk to in person was in our CT office (I was asked to go to the NYC office), so it was ultimately pointless and he dropped the issue.

I travel occasionally, for large projects or things that require in-person effort, but it’s not often. I’m currently on my second trip of 2023 and none expected the rest of the year.

(I started as one of two SysAdmins and I’m currently a manager of a SysAdmin team that’s spread out from California, Vegas, Florida and Poland.)

While I do agree face time with people occasionally is nice (we got everyone out on the project earlier this year except for Poland guy) and I find it helps remind you that the voice on the other side of the call is a human but if you have people who can deal with it, it’s not required. Only thing that we gained productivity-wise was a better sense of comradery going forward.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Good for you mate

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

I understand the anxiety but based on your experience you won't have any trouble finding a fully remote job, probably that pays more.

I've been mostly to fully remote since 2009 and the time I've had with my kids is worth more than anything I could have found in an office. Best of luck in your search!

[–] bloodsangre7 4 points 1 year ago

I'm glad you were able to recognize the quality of life imprisonment that work from home brought you and the impact it has on you and your family. With more and more ppl back in the office, WFH has shifted from a safety necessity to another 'perk' that companies can offer, like 401k matching or a 4/10 work schedule.

You are doing the right thing by standing your ground, you are indicating to them that they are in danger of losing talent if they do not continue to offer this competitive advantage to their employees, which should be a no-brainer with the work environment you described.

This should not preclude you from raises imo, and you are smart to be preparing your resume and looking for better opportunities. It is always smart to keep your options open. Good luck!

[–] p0op 3 points 1 year ago

You’ve made your case and stood your ground, and until it’s an official policy and nothing more than “guidance” you’ll probably be ok, honestly.

A few months back I was offered a promotion and a fancy new job title, with the caveat that I would need to move to another country. I countered with more or less the same argument as you, “I’ve been doing this from home for years and everyone I work with is remote anyways; I’m not moving” and was met with a “hmm…fair enough”.

[–] FlyingSquid 3 points 1 year ago

Pretty much the only reason I'm staying in the job I have now is that they let me work from home 15 hours a week. If I found a job that let me work at home more than that, I'd take it.

[–] mookulator 2 points 1 year ago

I guess it depends how much you like your job/employer. It’s clear that the added time with your family is a really high value, which I can strongly relate to.

If you really want to keep the job, maybe when it really comes down to it, you could compromise and do one day /week.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Power to you! Definitely agree with standing your ground and keeping your options open. If they value you, they’ll make exceptions. If not, you probably don’t want to work there anymore.

[–] node815 1 points 1 year ago

Everyone's comments here made me realize just how bad it is still with employers trying to get warm bodies in the office. My company used to be "Everyone who works from home wastes time and is less productive" They quickly realized when their hands were forced and the pandemic hit, there were much less sick days, and productivity has never been higher!

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