this post was submitted on 12 Sep 2024
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I was with her every minute of her last day. She made it to 18 years and her kidneys failed. We are so so sad.

I know that cats often search for a secluded place to die. But I believe / hope it was comforting to have her humans at her side.

Who else has this special experience of being with your cat in the final moments?

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Last year we had to put down our 20+ year old cat. We rescued her from my sister who had to leave her at our dad’s house after her first divorce. The cat’s actual age was uncertain, but I found an old digital camera with pictures of her in 2004.

It was a tough decision to make as she appeared to be fine mentally, but her body was not working. Her joints had become loose and made it difficult for her to control her movements.

[–] lemmonaut 7 points 3 months ago

Beautiful picture!

[–] MrEC 26 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Our 17 year old kitty passed a few weeks ago too. She went peacefully but it’s still painful for us. You don’t care for something that long without it affecting you. We went to a cat cafe connected to the humane society last week and donated her food and treats and spent time with the kittens. It really helped.

[–] lemmonaut 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Sorry for your loss. Could you be home when she went? We were actually lucky to be flexible that day.

[–] MrEC 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Thank you! I’m not generally a sharing kind of person, but am touched by the empathy of cat lovers. She went blind then catatonic very suddenly. We took her to the vet when we realized she wasn’t coming back. We had waited too long with her sister and she died in pain. It was traumatic for us and committed to not letting that happen again. We work from home, so she was with us at all times. The vet was very compassionate about the whole ordeal. They saw us early without waiting and made her and us as comfortable as possible. Whenever I get up from the couch to go to bed at night, I reflexively walk to her spot to say goodnight still. It’ll be a while but we intend to get some kittens to fill the void.

[–] lemmonaut 5 points 3 months ago

I also have the same nightly reflex.

[–] Carighan 16 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I have a lot of pictures of my Chili on her last evening and last morning. Don't look very nice though (she had her tongue stick out due to cancer) so I really don't want to dig them up and post them. She was the purriest tiny little old cat baby though. <3

[–] lemmonaut 6 points 3 months ago

Sorry for your loss! It's still important to also remember the not-so-pretty moments. Good you have those photos.

[–] kikutwo 11 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I did and I'm still impacted by it a year and a half later. Can't move on.

[–] lemmonaut 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Well, you don't have to. But you are allowed to.

[–] kikutwo 2 points 3 months ago

Thank you 😊

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I'm sorry for your loss, she's a beautiful cat ❤️

[–] lemmonaut 4 points 3 months ago

Thank you! Yes, she was so pretty.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Not yet but I dread the day. My cat is my best friend I can’t imagine losing him. I’m sorry for your loss

[–] lemmonaut 3 points 3 months ago
[–] ChefTyler1980 10 points 3 months ago

I’m so sorry, it’s so difficult to say goodbye. I’m glad you got spend some time together at the end. When we said goodbye to our kitty we were holding her and scratching her ears when she took her last breath.

[–] Zerlyna 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I had one pass away at 16 from liver failure. Held him in my arms at the vet while the final shot was done. That was years ago and I have tears in my eyes thinking about it now.

[–] lemmonaut 5 points 3 months ago

Wow, powerful love, sorry for your loss.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Sorry for your loss.

Our 19 year old also had kidney failure, and we spent every minute with him as well. On his last night, the sunset was in every direction, a full 360° sunset. April 30th was his last day and I will always miss him. He was Muteki; he was invincible.

Muteki and the Pink Balloon https://youtu.be/qTWAALHf3us

[–] lemmonaut 4 points 3 months ago

What a great video!

[–] SpaceNoodle 7 points 3 months ago

T passed away at home from aggressive cancer just over seven years ago. It was clear it was her last day and I sat beside her until she finally passed that night.

I know this isn't exactly part of the exercise, but: Wasn't so fortunate with N three years later, who was clearly in pain after a rapid decline following a good 20+ year run. It was the height of the pandemic, so I couldn't stay with him, having to drop him off at the vet to end his pain. It was consoling to know that he was in good hands with people who truly cared during his final moments, but it was heart-wrenching all the same. The blow was softened by being able to mentally prepare for it while watching his slow decline over a year or two, in stark contrast to T's very sudden 3-week period of dismay.

[–] Plantfoodclock 3 points 3 months ago

My 14 year old cat has ckd and my biggest fear is that I won't be there when she eventually passes. Since I've adopted her when she was 8, she hasn't been too friendly with other people or animals besides me, so I don't know who else would be able to give her comfort when she has to go (knowing of course, that's not usually cat behavior when they get close to death).

And I just want to make sure she feels loved until the very end.

[–] ExtraMedicated 3 points 3 months ago

Had to put mine down several weeks ago. She was also 18. I lost several other pets and four grandparents without shedding a tear, but this one broke me.

The vet appointment was at 6pm, so I could spend the last day with her. She acted more or less normal for her age, except not eating for three days and throwing up water.

I was rubbing her head until her heart stopped. I still miss her so much.