this post was submitted on 12 Jun 2023
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Anyone else feel oppressed by the Q-slur and feel that its widespread use harms LGBT rights more than it helps? It feels like every LGBT-adjacent “safe space” isn’t safe for those affected by the Q-slur, especially on Pride Month.

#LGBT

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[–] Acamon 23 points 1 year ago

I don't, and I personally like Q as description. But I do think it's one of the risk of trying to "reclaim" a slur. It's empowering for some but hurtful to others. I'm sorry it's upsetting to you, and hope you find some space where you feel comfortable.

[–] liontigerwings 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

outsider straight perspective here, but I think reclaiming the word is smart. It disarms the bigots. Words only have the power they're given. Don't give them that.

[–] Kainsmasquerade 0 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I heard the same logic from a poetry slammer once, who argued Germans should just go around and greet everyone with “Heil Hitler” and take the phrase away from Neonazis (and therefore taking away its power).

I wouldn’t feel comfortable doing it, but if it angers a Nazi, I could be up for it.

[–] liontigerwings 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The problem there is the phrase only has one meaning. It will always mean something along the lines of praise Hitler.

Queer on the other hand has had several meaning and most of it's history means abnormal or different than what is considered normal.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

@liontigerwings Reclaiming it gives another meaning, at least in the theory of reclaiming.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

The difference with the "Heil hitler" prase, is that it identifies the speaker as a nazi-sympathizer. Slurs serve to describe those spoken about/to.

[–] captainlezbian 12 points 1 year ago

I don’t think it harms our rights at all. I understand how many people who grew up in an era where it was more inflammatory might feel hurt by it’s widespread adoption, but as far as rights go it’s not what costs us rights. I’ll also say I think that having an umbrella term for all of us that’s easily said might actually increase our ability to push for our rights.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

@HaleyHalcyon

I never thought I fit in with LGBT because I'm pansexual but never felt "gay." Come from a generation of playing "smear the q-s." And teachers telling us that "there are two kinds of men, steers and q-s."

Due to this, I definitely see the your point. I was called this a lot as a kid, and it definitely hurt, but it was before I was out even to myself, and haven't been called that as an adult, so I don't have that perspective.

However, it wasn't until it started to be reclaimed that I came to terms with who I am and the people I am attracted to. Q just feels right for where I am on sexuality and gender if that makes sense. It is the only slot I feel like I belong.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I had a similar experience with it growing up and it also feels like the most complete label for me. There are other labels that work for me factually, but it's what seems to most fully encompass me.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

I agree with you.

If OP doesn't like to be called Q, they should verbalize that to their friend group and the people they interact with. They should also make it known that it is just their preference, and they do not speak for anyone else. But to say that I shouldn't identify as Q because they are offended with the label... OP needs to get over themselves, go touch some grass, and stop trying to police the identities of others in an attempt to push marginalized people out of the larger community of marginalized.

[–] RecursiveParadox 2 points 1 year ago

Man I cannot believe people are downvoting this post. Have an upvote from an ally to compensate; not sure how that translates over at kbin, but hopefully it' something.