this post was submitted on 02 May 2024
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Asklemmy

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I was thinking of something like the Duff Man theme and slapping sounds and moans, but I feel that Lemmy knows better.

(Obviously, I would start texting and calling him during the next meeting)

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[–] [email protected] 39 points 7 months ago (1 children)

My colleagues personal items and digital devices are off limits.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 7 months ago (1 children)

And, in the modern era, cellphones are extremely personal devices. Don't fuck with someone else's phone.

[–] KeepFlying 8 points 7 months ago

Exactly. That shit has their personal photos, financial info, connections to everyone they know and all their private conversations, etc , etc, etc. Don't fuck with it.

Anything that requires you to open an app, view any pictures, etc is a breach of privacy.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Does basically every human with a cellphone have their phone on vibrate at all times?

[–] dingus 8 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

When I bought a newer phone a few years ago, I was really disappointed with how weak the vibrate was. It's a flagship phone and I have the vibration intensity set to maximum, but I still often don't realize that my phone is vibrating in my pocket... especially at work. Never had that happen in a phone before. Idk if newer phones just ship with weaker vibration motors nowadays or if it's just this particular phone line.

That being said, I actually like my ringtone and notification sounds. I turn them on while at home but leave it on vibrate at work.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago

Pixel device?

[–] brygphilomena 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Nope. I don't keep my phone in my pocket all the time and don't want a smart watch at all to randomly vibrate against me.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

I have my phone on vibrate, don’t keep it on me all the time and don’t have a smartwatch

[–] [email protected] 22 points 7 months ago

A pro-union announcement. He'll get fired immediately.

[–] Anticorp 9 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I would just give the phone back, since I'm not 12 anymore.

[–] sir_pronoun 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

And he said: β€œTruly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.

Matthew 18:3

[–] Anticorp 2 points 7 months ago

I'm pretty sure that is not what he meant, but I could be wrong. Maybe we need more pranks.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Oops I did it again by Britney Spears

[–] MycelialMass 5 points 7 months ago

Songs a banger tbh

[–] [email protected] 9 points 7 months ago

The sound of Agatha Trunchbull's angry grunt as she throws the shot put in her office to intimidate Ms. Honey in Matilda (1996).

Or really, any of the noises she makes throughout that entire movie.

Disgusting things, children. Glad I never was one.

[–] andrewta 7 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

Find the most erotic moaning you can and change the ring tone for an incoming call. Bonus points if they are in the confessional booth at church when the phone goes off.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago (1 children)

The chorus of this masterpiece, enough to be funny without going too mutch over the edge.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

this masterpiece

Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.

[–] sir_pronoun 7 points 7 months ago

I would like to point out I did not ask lemmy "What morals would you preach to strangers on the Internet without knowing the specific context of the situation", but what sounds you would set.

All of you nicely mannered boys and girls get a pat on the head, though.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

Surprised no one has mentioned Archer's ringtone.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago

You lock it.

[–] Godric 2 points 7 months ago

Just one, extremely long and wavery fart noise that ends pretty wet for the ringtone.

For notifications, maxed out volume deathmetal screams.

It's the simple things in life!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago

A P.E.T. (Personal Electronic Thing) is an increadibly personal item, it often litterarly carries the key's to a person's bank account, it carries their personal and sometimes intimite photos, it carries their passwords, their entertainment, their search history and much, much more.

Doing ANYTHING other than locking the device will make you the prime suspect in any kind of legal/trust issue the phone get's involved in.

[–] brlemworld 1 points 7 months ago

We all work from home. I don't get it.