Post funny things about programming here! (Or just rant about your favourite programming language.)
The fuck? How the fuck did that happen? I didn't even fucking ... That's not what I fucking wrote. Wtf? Fuck is this? Fuck this shit! Oh, fuck. Fucking mother fuck. Stupid fucking auto complete.
My roommates probably think this is a religious mantra by now.
Don't forget the XKCD "WTFs per minute" review metric
God damnit! Who the fuck wrote this streaming pile of dog shit? Which ignorant fucktard has their head shoved so far up their ass that they would do something this stupid!?
Checks git blame
Ahhh fuck!
checks git blame
~oh~ ~fuck~ ~you~ ~past~ ~self~
That asshole gets me every time.
it's fun in other languages too
Puta que pariu, quem foi o corno que escreveu essa merda? Vá tomar no cu, esse código não foi escrito, foi cagado. Que caralho de emprego bosta esse meu, ter que mexer com lixo fedorento igual esse. COMPILA, CACETE! Merda, saco, bosta, FDP, corno!!
This was a struggle for me going from hobbyist programmer to working at a company. I tried to tone it down. Really. But eventually I got "promoted" to having my own office with a suspiciously thick door. Hmm…
I'm not seeing the issue here
Just say your profanities aloud and don't let them make it to version control.
In the first major software system I designed and helped build I was a little too open in my comments. For years after that software had entered sunset I'd still get Slack pings along the lines of: "This looks like a Maximum Derek comment: ..." They were all diatribes about whatever was giving me grief when I was writing the code and they would all look perfectly at home in the script for 48 Hours (minus the racial or sexuality slurs).
In my defense we were working with PHP 5.3 at the time.
I grew up in a bit of a sketchy neighborhood and up until my mid 20's all my jobs were the sort where everybody cursed a lot, plus Finns tend to curse a lot in general.
I absolutely have not kept my cursing out of repositories, although looking at my last work project which had about 33000 lines all in all (maybe 2/3 written by me) when including comments, I was surprised to find it only 4 had "shits" and 6 "fucks". One line in an example & test file had both:
zap.NewExample().Sugar().Errorw("welp, shit's fucked",
"IsBadRequest", IsBadRequest(err),
Field(err))
and then there's some comments like
// - turn the unsafe.Pointer into a *[8]byte, allowed due to unsafe pointer fuckery
// FIXME: this is just to make cli tool usage easier. It's a horrible fucking hack and should be
// nuked from orbit
// FIXME: get rid of all this gorilla legacy bullshit. Could start by getting rid of the needless
// Interface type
Yeah, that's the kind of thing I did only more often. Plus it was back when the conventional wisdom was that 50% of source code should be comments. So there was a LOT.
Honestly I would love to work on a codebase full of profanity, let me know I'm not alone in my anger towards an inanimate object
Also would help make it feel less corporate
Ah PHP 5.3... totally understandable.
I'm usually completely chill when I'm on the clock. When I write code for myself, that's when I feel personally attacked by my mistakes.
I'm the exact opposite: when I was still coding for work, that was when the curses flowed forth like a majestic waterfall, but I've always loved working on my own projects and don't mind adversity and mistakes at all
I’m both, I say fuck all the time. I fuck on and off the clock.
A proper fucker
How dare they!?
It is the language of the machine spirit
Do this have something to do with the ducks I always hear about?
So basically programmers are pornstars?
Only in the BDSM subgenre
Only the ones that work for the BBC
Could be their most used application too https://profanity-im.github.io/
There better be some fucking profanity in the source
Personally unrelatable. I assume this is different in industry code but in both personal and open source projects I've never seen or used anything like that.
(And I'm really not against iNaPpRoPriAtE words; I think they're not something bad to use and I often find it ridiculous how they're frowned upon in US culture, e.g. movie ratings. But I still want to keep my code neutral / professional.)
I don't think they mean profanity in the code. I think they mean profanity uttered by the programmers while writing code.
I see; I've seen quite some memes about swear words in code, therefore I thought about that. But makes sense, thanks. (I can't relate to that either though.)
