this post was submitted on 06 Feb 2024
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Memes

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[–] IzzyScissor 132 points 9 months ago (10 children)

If "your man card can be revoked" then you understand that gender is performative and conditional.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You would think that, wouldn't you?

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[–] Exusia 100 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Just can't win with some people. And that's ok, life isn't about impressing everyone - anyone who tries gets exhausted real fast.

[–] [email protected] 53 points 9 months ago (1 children)

The only way to live life without pissing somebody off is by not doing anything worth doing.

[–] [email protected] 49 points 9 months ago (1 children)

And then you piss somebody off for not doing anything.

[–] mihnt 23 points 9 months ago

And it's the same person arguing with OP.

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[–] [email protected] 95 points 9 months ago (2 children)

If enough of us behave girly, it's no longer girly.

[–] Lemminary 63 points 9 months ago (12 children)

This is why I like it when I see men wear skirts/kilts, wear eyeliner and/or paint their nails. It's not something I'm into but I think it's cool when I see it.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 9 months ago (3 children)

Ngl it's also just because femboys are hot.

[–] UnfortunateShort 15 points 9 months ago

That and that painted nails can look good on anyone

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[–] [email protected] 43 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I've had that discussion before.

Gender roles, and thus gender presentation, are cultural for the most part. Some are common enough to multiple cultures that it approaches being just human culture.

But even in western (us, canada, europe) cultures, there have been periods where the presentation of masculinity would be considered feminine in other eras. So gender roles & presentation aren't fixed in a given culture.

If I, regardless of what my genitals are, present as a man, then I am effectively the same as whatever a man is in my culture. If that also includes taking on the gender roles of "man", then that's another layer.

However, this also means that when enough men shift their presentation and roles, anyone holding to the previous roles and presentation are now "less" a man in the cultural sense. It really, truly is a majority rules situation, and the minority are what get relabeled (usually).

The more men that reject an arbitrary paradigm of masculinity, the more we shift to an open, loose definition of what is and isn't masculine, with the eventual possibility that gender becomes so loose in definition that masculine and feminine become irrelevant terms, if the labels also lose relevance to the majority. And I believe that if enough people reject fixed gender paradigms, the terms would inevitably cease to matter.

I mean, we've already started to add qualifiers. We have traditional gender roles as a specific thing as separate from current gender roles.

This isn't to deny that hormones and genetics will push people into behaviors that are linked to gender because they're mostly linked to sex. But even with those pressures, we usually have room how we express those behaviors.

It's why I always tell folks, particularly younger folks, to not worry much about labels. Be who you are, as long as who you are isn't a douche, and you'll eventually find the labels that feel right. And there's a good chance you'll end up shifting your self over time anyway, which is fine. As long as you don't fixate on labels as defining the person, the self, you can freely shift labels as the self shifts. It's when you pick a label and think that you have to fit it in all ways, forever, that you run into trouble.

So, fuck yeah. If you feel "girly", be girly. Enjoy that shit. Be your best self. It'll eventually work out :)

[–] captainlezbian 11 points 9 months ago

Exactly. I think labels are useful as communication tools, but they’re an active hindrance to self exploration. One of the greatest things I ever did for myself was completely setting them aside when exploring my gender until I knew what I wanted. It was a lot easier to run off a checklist of options than to sort through a variety of labels, even when I fell solidly into some labels.

[–] [email protected] 50 points 9 months ago (1 children)

It's often time better to not just argue with these asshats. Waste of your time and energy while achieving less than a dog barking at a tree.

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[–] captainlezbian 47 points 9 months ago (9 children)

Ok but also you aren’t nonbinary just because you’re an effeminate man. They’re different things entirely

[–] tan00k 17 points 9 months ago (8 children)

You can't gatekeep being nonbinary. Not unless you're prepared to define it explicitly, which will exclude many people - and not everyone will agree with your definition either.

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[–] [email protected] 44 points 9 months ago (12 children)

Even tho im a cishet male i can absolutely imagine how freaking annoying these people could be.

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[–] [email protected] 37 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (3 children)

Homophobes are cute. Me and my homies only jerk off to homophobes. Just like those old WW2 vets that invented the gay leather scene. Except now the kink is to dress up as an Ultra-American instead of a German nazi. I got a 1776 shirt literally just to fuck with.

(One part humor, one part truth, one part bullshit. If my lame comedy makes anyone angry they aren't living the life they should be. Treat yo self.)

[–] UnfortunateShort 10 points 9 months ago (1 children)

If nostalgia ever kicks in, German is my first language :P

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[–] UnfortunateShort 22 points 9 months ago

This has gotta be the meme that best sums up the situation lmao

[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago (7 children)

What makes a man, is it the power in his hands?

Is it his quest for glory?

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 9 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago (1 children)

It's funny how it only seems to be a problem in on direction. Boyish women or 'tomboys' are applauded in a lot of circles.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Historically less so. Even back in the 80s lots of girls i knew and thought of as tom boys. Where forced to dress and act girlie by there parents. Further back you go more limits there were.

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago (4 children)

Then you have another person calling them trans

[–] [email protected] 13 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (2 children)

As an amab man with long hair and emotions that is frequently misgenedered (even with facial hair) yall are down voting something that is far too true

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[–] Deadeyegai 13 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Then as a man, I choose to act like a girly-Man©. See? Has Man© and that symbol makes it official. That means I can do anything <'ronswanson meme.jpg'> Checkmate. Easy victory

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