Amongst other things for different kinds of stimulation, I am occasionally able to get my wife to do tippy taps when I can make her delightfully surprised, and it's the most adorable thing ever.
this post was submitted on 15 Jan 2024
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My mom has brought it to my attention that I do hand motions when I'm stressing a convo with her. So now I'm aware of it at times. Kind of looks like I'm doing poor imitations of like Naruto hand jitsu stuff. Likely have some other stuff but I'm not aware of them.
I wonder if I can implement a jutsu-style stim instead, that'd be kinda cool (right?).
Everyone can do some anxiety jutsu lol
My stims mostly occur when I'm emotionally aroused, the most I notice stress stims and happy stims. I generally knead my hands, i.e., I open and close them repeatedly. My mood factors into this by how much I use gravity-defying behavior. So when I'm stressed I generally hold my hands down to my sides, but when it's a happy stim I hold them up. Stressed and Happy also are different as stress causes me to completely tense up, while happy can make me be springy, almost jumping up and down. Apart from that I also do vocal stims, mostly short hums, sometimes melodic. One other sensory stimulation thing I like is blankets, so I always have a fleece blanket on the sofa, and I even have one at work.
oh my
I've heard the term "stimming" before, and never had a clear answer on what it meant. After taking a look through this thread, I now have yet another thing to add to the list of obvious symptoms I should have seen in myself years ago.
I have a tendency to take things apart, or move whatever moveable pieces are on something. I've made little toys/implements to enable this at work so I'm not just taking pens apart.
I'm self diagnosed thanks to my wife giving birth to our wonderful autistic children and as we watched them grow up realised I'm autistic too.
When I'm excited about something and alone, I'll either, hard to explain, try to mash my fingers together while moving them, as if to try and tie them up in a knot.
The other one I have is placing my hands over my mouth, like I'm reacting to something with shock, and then excitedly breath out in sharp short breaths.
My youngest on the other hand flaps his hands at the wrist. π He loves PSVR and has broken several move controllers thanks to his stimming.
You have an autistic son?
I have two, both on different levels of the spectrum.
I hum to myself nearly constantly. If it's not the song stuck in my head, I'll just make up a tune. I quite like it, really.
I used to do that a lot back in middle school. Then a girl made fun of me for it, so I stopped and would only listen to it in my head.
I sometiems do the same thing! Keeps the mind occupiated.
I tap my fingers, usually on my thighs. I also have a bad one for high anxiety situations where I'll rub my thumbnail into the pads of my other fingers. I have actully cut my fingertips open this way in high stress moments.
Most commonly I put my hands almost together with my fingers spread as though I'm very securely holding a snow globe and then I shake my hands. I don't know why or what started it.
Mainly with my touch through musics by synesthesia.
But the best are with my vestibular system, the more I'm out of breathe the best it is.
sweet
I do not think I 'stim' in the way that others in this thread seem to.
I have a nicotine addiction.
Feeling ancy? Feeling uncomfortable, restless? Stressed out after a ludicrous social encounter?
Puff on a vape for me.
I do not recommend this, by the way. I have been trying to quit for a decade now and still can't do it.
Move to a country where it's prohibitively expensive. I used to smoke where it was <$1 for a pack (mine were $1.25 because I was 'fancy'), but decided to do the working holiday visa in Australia on the advice of a mate living there. Another friend brought me a vape from the US (maybe in 2017?) and a load of juice. I ran out within a few months and went on the hunt for more. I had started at a pretty high mg and went from 18mg down to half that by mixing with 0mg stuff, but then found that none of the available juice had any nicotine whatsoever, even in the half-dodgy stores. I tried 0mg... it was like breathing flavoured air with no kick. I stopped. Cigarettes were no longer an option because they absolutely stank after not puffing on one for months, and they were over $20 a damn pack.
Interesting advice, unfortunately I have been made homeless by my criminal and delusional family who decided that my therapist and psychologist telling me that I am Autistic is actually me being delusional to the point I should be thrown into a long term mental health care facility in the middle of nowhere.
Dont have my passport any more, nor any possessions save literally the clothes on my back.
Hooray!
Iβve been thinking about telling my parents/siblings of my diagnosis, but havenβt for fear theyβll suddenly think of me as βotherβ, βsubhumanβ. Happily, my husband knows and supports me utterly.
I wish I knew you irl, and could help. How old are you?
In my 30s. Dont want to be too specific.
I appreciate your concern, but hopefully at this point I will probably be able to resume more normal living soon.
Somewhat ironically, I am living off of SSDI.
Though through being homeless I lost my phones and contents of my wallet and sustained many injuries, many times...
... I am currently about halfway across the country, in a relatively shitty, but heated and plumbed sort of crap tier motel, that I basically lucked on on finding, as it allows month to month leases, as opposed to basically every motel in America that at some point will tell you that you have to find somewhere else to stay, even if you can afford otherwise.
Basically because we hate the homeless here in America.
But yeah. I have a bed, shower/tub, fridge and microwave, ive got enough food stamps (EBT) to live off of, and whats better is I managed to find a nearby low income apartment community thats within walking distance, and, assuming I can manage to replace my ID or get a new one in this new state, I should qualify for it.
Stay there a year, maybe two, using money saved from its low rent to fix up my ruined credit score (got cards stolen a lot, got scammed a lot, amd sometimes needing to eat or not freeze to death is more important than your credit score), and then maybe move somewhere else, who knows.
Its a good thing I am more or less totally fine with minimal social interaction face to face and will more than be able to occupy myself when I can afford to get a Steam Deck... main actual problem with that is, basically no motel in America will let you use them as an address for mailing anything to or registering as 'I live here'.
Which of course creates a hilarious paradox: the vast, vast majority of federal and state programs that exist to help the homeless?
You need to have a permanent address.
Anyway, after nearly a year and a half at this point being mostly outdoors and walking stupendous distances, all my torn ligaments and muscles have now had some time to heal in the last roughly two months I have been in my current locale.
Just have to not freeze to death outside.
Yeeeeehaw, basically.
Good luck to you! I am impressed with your resilience. Hang in there.
Thanks!
My data plan finally refreshed, and the thunder client times out and wont let you use it without a high speed connection.
So, its been two weeks, and I managed to talk to the manager here and basically by my blind luck or good fortune, this place lets tenants receive mail, and also my state of origin updated their procedures for replacing a drivers license such that it is at least actually possible for them to mail me a replacement, after a long stupid snail mail process.
Cant do it online. Because... ???
So yeah. If I had not found this place, I would have frozen to death in the -30 F winter. Shelters around here are night only, and warming centers are day only, and I am very likely to have been assaulted or had my phone or wallet stolen from me again, which would also basically have resulted in my death, or at the very least much, much more painful and hopeless wandering, unable to actually live anywhere.
Also if my state of origin hadnt updated its policies, or if this random place i found by wandering the streets hadnt also been affordable and most importantly, let me recieve mail here, I would basically also never be able to live anywhere, as i cant afford to bus back to where im from and get the id in person without, you guessed it, becoming homeless again.
Basically America hates the homeless, and the worst part is most of the solutions to a great many of these problems are known and relatively cheap and easy fixes. But no one votes for or much less advocates for them because either they dont know, care, or more usually, despise any effort being put toward something that doesnt have an immediate visible benefit.
Oh well. I tried. I was a data analyst for a non profit helping the homeless and well crime happened to me and they didnt give a fuck about me.
Anyway... I will probably be at this place another month or two while I wait to get my ids, and then so far I have figured out two possible affordable apartments i can live at for cheaper than this motel, once my ids come in.
At least ive been able to basically take baths and massage my ungodly sore and taut muscles and tendons for 2 weeks now. I can actually walk without immense pain now, for a short while. Still got some healing left to do.
My budget just barely works out to be able to afford Feb, but it looks a lot better there on out.
Long term I hope to get out of this hell hole of a country.
Not sure where Id go, but hopefully somewhere relatively peaceful.
Thanks for the update. I hope you manage to get out of the U.S. eventually. I feel this place is going down fast.
solving Rubik's cubes is how I keep my hands busy, it's extremely satisfying and tactile. I do it constantly at my desk, basically whenever I'm thinking or watching something.
I also love putting a blanket between my legs and rubbing them together, it feels like it releases all of my stress and anxiety and gets me super cozy.
I practice card tricks in zoom meetings! keeps my hands from flapping around
The Rubik's cube is more of a hobby, not a stim
I can see how you would think that, but it's really both. The mechanical sensation of turning the cube is very satisfying and I make a lot of quick flicking motions with my fingers in predefined patterns. I solve pretty much passively, automatically by now, and never time myself.
I think nearly anything can be a stim. It's really about what the experience is like to the person doing it, not whether it looks like stimming to you from the outside. Please try not to invalidate anybody's stim. If you're confused, ask questions about their experience.
It depends as my stimming changes over time. I've settled back into the (annoying for others) habit of making a noise as I breathe in, I don't even know what it is that I do, but it's like a dull click in my head when I do it. Other things would be foot twitching, blinking a particular way, hair playing, beard scratching, finger rubbing, and so on. I used to do some clicky thing with my eyes but gladly stopped that as I wasn't sure it was very good for me.
Mine are flapping hands, shaking feet and legs, bouncing, and clapping the most.
I like to fold paper receipts into pointy ends and use them to poke, stroke and generally pick at my fingers (usually my index), the good thing is that I can do it discretely in my pocket or under a table etc.
Foot tapping/bouncing too, and I also like to stroke my hair to remove dead strands and twirl the ends. Recently I've started to enjoy making a popping sound with my lips, but mainly when I'm alone as it's audible
I also have resurrected my childhood/teenage/early 20's blanket that I like to smell (I don't know if that's a stim exactly, but I enjoy sniffing it, and it feels comforting when I do this)
Ooooh
Singing. I sing constantly, I wish I didn't. People think I'm happy, but no, just doing my thing.
Oh, and stretching my hands open, as open as I can, like a hand yawn.
must have a great voice.
I like to stim by tapping my feet.
I usually bend my fingers to the inside of my hand or play with my phone case (since I have a cover case, i can open and close it, but before I had this one broke a lot of them, because i was pulling off and reataching the corner) plus making sounds corellated with doing things.
Bend your fingers to the inside?
This:
I'm not diagnosed, but I stim a lot. When I'm happy I shake my wrists or flail my arms a little and sometimes I bounce up and down. When I'm stressed I rub my hands together in a regular motion and/or scratch myself (arms and neck) and swing from side to side. I also rock a lot, both when happy and stressed. When I eat something I like I kind of wobble the spoon or fork in my hand and as a child I used to hum while eating, but I've since stopped doing that. Something I always do no matter my mood is tapping my fingers to the music that's currently stuck in my head (I always have a song playing in my head or sometimes sentences or funny sounding words, idk why). I used to try and suppress those stims, but I'm much happier now that I mostly embrace them (at least when I'm alone or with people I trust).
I get the sentences/particular words thing in my head. Have mentioned it to individuals on occasion but it's only ever been received with dismissal so I thought it was just a personal, unexplainable quirk of mine. You're the first person I've seen referencing it. I can inexplicably become struck by a word or short phrase such as "conjugational recombination" and have it rattle around my head for hours. I can get on with my day but say I'm at work and it's a day with an odd/previously un-ushered phrase stuck in my head, I can get some tasks done as normal then in between tasks my brain is as if it's enjoying some rhythmic/phonetic quality of the phrase as it cycles it repeatedly through my consciousness. It can get old very quickly but I tend to have no control over when it leaves me. Doesn't happen very often thankfully.
Music has been a massive part of my life since I was about 10. I'm always tapping out a rhythm, or have a restless foot/leg. My wife has called me Thumper after the Bambi character for as long as I remember. I don't tend to notice if I have a restless leg at work unless I'm emailing then it's obvious and pretty constant; but at home it's pretty much all the time. Even if it's just a toe doing an occasional stretch or whatever. I try not to "BE Thumper" when I notice it but then I find I'll end up sort of pushing or pulling a foot/leg against something ie my other foot/leg. There's less noticeable movement with that but definitely still something going on.
Are these behaviours ever associated with allistic people? I would have thought the phrases thing to have more in common with tourettes given my experience of it is that of it being involuntary.
I don't get annoyed by the repetition, I actually enjoy it when it's interesting sounding words or the way a sentence was said was funny wo me when I first heard it. Conjugational recombination is a great word, btw!
The only theory I have is that it might be a form of echolalia, where instead of repeating words out loud you just do it in your head (maybe something like supressed echolalia? I've heard some people online say that it can present that way, but idk how generally accepted that idea is.) As far as I know echolalia is also a symptom of tourettes. I don't know if it can also occurs in allistic people.
I like to:
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Rock left and right at the hip if I'm standing still. Similarly, I will rock from my toes to my heels.
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Change my body weight from one leg to the other.
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Play beats! I'll play by banging on things. I also like to tap my fingers to my thumb while moving my hand like a conductor. I can do this while also playing the beat while clicking my tongue in my mouth.
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I pretend I'm dancing by rocking.
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Hum music really low so that mostly no one can hear it.
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In times I'm very overwhelmed, I will play music at 100% volume, pace to the beat, flap my hands out as if I was shaking water off of my hands to the beat, and just walk in my house for a few hours. It helps get the energy out.
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At max overwhelm, I will put music at 100% volume and bang on the walls to the beat really hard. I'm surprised the cops haven't shown up, but luckily, my neighbors kinda get it, and I do this rarely.
Chewing gum. Loudly. People hate me for it.
I was diagnosed late at 34. I'm slowly learning about how well I've been masking EVERYTHING. My lip biting, nail biting, and I sucked my thumb until I was 14 used to just be "bad habits" but now I know it's stimming. I was heavily bullied as a kid for what I thought was "no reason" but I'm starting to think that they picked up on on the autism and excluded me for it. My diagnosis came with questions AND answers.