No Stupid Questions

How loud is loud? Is it only loud children or children of any volume? How do you feel about loud adults?

I would echo the recommendation for counseling. However, is this a larger issue or unique to children? Do you find yourself getting disproportionately angry at other sources of annoyances? Answering that question might help you know whether there is a larger need to address.

IMO They're just small humans and like their larger counterparts some are worth my time and some aren’t. You sound ageist. My partner hates kids, much like you, but has slowly become fond of a select few we know. I’ve never really minded kids - but I’ve always been able to hand them back as I don’t have any of my own.

I struggle with a lot of sounds, having a sensory processing disorder, the list of which is far too long to write out here. So I totally understand the frustration and how rage inducing it is, you are definitely not alone. Especially when people don't understand it's not a patience issue, it's a 'my brain isn't wired the same way as yours and it genuinely cannot be fixed' issue.

Other people have mentioned therapy, which is definitely a good idea. They can help you find ways to channel the energy into something else, or help you find the root cause (if it's a children-specific thing, and not just a general sensory issue), or teach you good cognitive behavioral therapy practices.

In the interim, since finding a good therapist for you can take a lot of time, I would definitely recommend some form of earplugs. Mine have saved me and my sanity so so so many times. If I can recommend a particular pair, I would suggest the Loop Switch, since they let you adjust the sound reduction levels on the fly - but any brand / even the foam tip ones (as long as they fit you properly!) can help immeasurably. For me, just knowing I have earplugs with me helps dealing with these sounds, even if I don't wind up using them, just knowing the option is there. Some form of stress ball or those grip / forearm strengtheners might also be of use for you? It can be a good distraction, as well as allowing yourself to let off some of the steam in a relatively healthy and inconspicuous manner.

And kudos for knowing this is a problem for you, and looking for help on how to improve it. I hope you're able to make progress you want, one way or another. Good luck, OP - we're rooting for you

embrace it

I was a little like that until I had a kid myself. Much less than you perhaps, but I didn't have fun with kids, I never knew what to do, what to tell them, and I would be very unforgiving with kids who are cheating or lying for fun.

I always thought that when you have one, yours is different.

When i meet my soulmate, I knew she would be an awesome mother and it helped me retain some faith. We ended up having a boy who is now 4 and a half.

I must admit, I didn't know I had this much patience in me. Still not knowing what the hell I'm doing but I lowered the bar as much as I could : he's happy, and he's fed.

Now it's not always easy, and he tests my limits daily by pushing all the proper buttons. Sometimes I ask my girlfriend for an.... Emergency relief.

But now I kinda understand how to enter children's world. Doesn't work with all of them, and sometimes I must adapt. I still have a hard time tolerating crying over nothing serious, but I found ways to go around that and give hugs.

I try to remind myself of old memories when I did some very similar things with I was a kid, sometimes I'm not very proud...

All in all, I'm not telling to have kids, but just to say it can change. I just happened to have taken the "hard way", and I didn't regret any of it.

Welcome to Lemmy. Welcome to autism.

You seems to react to high pitched voice/sound of children. Hate the noise not the origin

That's the fun part, you don't!