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...why the fuck do americant's like to go against our very own natural urges?
Religion.
That's a mechanism, but not really an explanation. We could have (and historically have had) a very horny religion rather than one that hates anyone caught getting off.
I'd put the real blame on Patriarchy. Old dudes hate it when young dudes fuck. Incels hate it when anyone else gets laid. Sons are jealous of how much pipe their moms are getting. Straight men are convinced that gay men want their assholes (and secretly jealous of the gay orgy happening next door). Locals are terrified of big dick foreigners running off with their moms, wives, and daughters. And when these are the people that get to make the rules about fucking, its Mutually Assured Destruction for us all.
If you want a sexually progressive society, you need to be like the Bonobo. Put the horniest middle-aged women in charge and let male sexuality be a competition rather than a threat. Then all the grumpy, violent chimps get replaced with fabulous preening peacocks and everyone gets amazingly good at sucking clit.