this post was submitted on 14 Dec 2023
839 points (98.7% liked)

Microblog Memes

5888 readers
4440 users here now

A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

Rules:

  1. Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
  2. Be nice.
  3. No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
  4. Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.

Related communities:

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 79 points 11 months ago (5 children)

Dog ownership is hearing a gag from the dead of sleep and launching out of bed to move the dog to the bathroom before she vomits on the carpet

[–] Kioga 76 points 11 months ago (4 children)

This is also cat ownership. :(

It’s hard getting back to sleep with all the adrenaline flowing.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I have a dust pan, like for sweeping, that I keep by the bed, I stick maxi pads to the flat part and use it to catch the barfs. Much easier than moving the horking cat.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 11 months ago (1 children)

This only works if you don't have a cat that turns his head at the last second to avoid the vomit catching device.

[–] idunnololz 6 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Yeah why does my cat refuse to vomit on the floor and always does it on the carpet?!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

My only guess is that cats are disrespectful arseholes. That's why I like them though.

[–] danielbln 3 points 11 months ago

Ours is polite enough to only ever hurl onto surfaces that are easily cleaned.

[–] ReiRose 1 points 11 months ago

Is my cat broken? He doesn't vomit.

[–] smackjack 1 points 11 months ago

Just get yourself a carpet cleaner. Bissell makes some good ones.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 11 months ago (1 children)

"HURP. HURP. HURP. HURP."

"OH JESUS CHRIST NO NO NO INTO THE KITCHEN PLEASE"

[–] Alteon 27 points 11 months ago (2 children)

We've got a husky that views this as a "middle of the night" snack. He hears that "Hurp, Hurp" sound and IMMEDIATELY runs over to where the cat is. Full run at 2am He wants to be the first to savor the delicious hair sausage.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Well the phrase hair sausage is going on the list of fucking awful now.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Where was that phrase before?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

Thankfully nowhere near me until today.

[–] vaquedoso 9 points 11 months ago

What a terrible day to have eyes

[–] [email protected] 10 points 11 months ago

Does it ever work?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

moments earlier, the cat hacked-up a hairball on the rug between the bed and bathroom for you to keep your feet warm with.

[–] xkforce 4 points 11 months ago

This is also cat ownership