this post was submitted on 28 Sep 2023
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Smartphone sales down 22 percent in Q2, the worst performance in a decade::North American sales are bad for everyone, except, miraculously, Google.

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[–] Dasnap 39 points 1 year ago (6 children)

Time to start development on rectal computers.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

Those are called remote controlled sex toys and already exist :)

[–] LucasWaffyWaf 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

It's all about the vibration alert

[–] elbarto777 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Dasnap 16 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (2 children)

For an in depth analysis of your shit

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Monitor your shit cycle with the new iFart

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

That could actually be useful (IBD gang)

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Thats the fountain pen I keep in my butt

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Isn't that essentially what that one chess player was accused of?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Those are called remote controlled sex toys and already exist :)

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Wait.. a few days ago I read something about smart toilets using anal prints and internet connectivity. So rectal computers are not too far off.

I don't understand the use case of such an invention

[–] electrogamerman 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

For example you have a a bidet, and several people in your household. Each person likes the water temperature differenr, or their anus is in a different position. Usually, one has to configure those settings manually each time they poop. Well, no more with the anal print identifier (API). You can sit, relax and do your business, the API will read your anus print and adjust the temperature and water aim automatically.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Thank you!

I keep talking about how my API makes my defecation that much better and truly understands my shit better than I could have hoped for and my coworkers keep slowly backing away from me. I don't understand why they are so scared of what an API can do for them and the ease of their work on the toilet.