ADHD

9698 readers

33 users here now

A casual community for people with ADHD

Values:

Acceptance, Openness, Understanding, Equality, Reciprocity.

Rules:

No abusive, derogatory, or offensive post/comments.
No porn, gore, spam, or advertisements allowed.
Do not request for donations.
Do not link to other social media or paywalled content.
Do not gatekeep or diagnose.
Mark NSFW content accordingly.
No racism, homophobia, sexism, ableism, or ageism.
Respectful venting, including dealing with oppressive neurotypical culture, is okay.
Discussing other neurological problems like autism, anxiety, ptsd, and brain injury are allowed.
Discussions regarding medication are allowed as long as you are describing your own situation and not telling others what to do (only qualified medical practitioners can prescribe medication).

Encouraged:

Funny memes.
Welcoming and accepting attitudes.
Questions on confusing situations.
Seeking and sharing support.
Engagement in our values.

Relevant Lemmy communities:

Neurodivergent Life Hacks

lemmy.world/c/adhd will happily promote other ND communities as long as said communities demonstrate that they share our values.

founded 1 year ago

MODERATORS

MrPoopyButthole

[email protected]

How do you handle being misunderstood? (self.adhd)

submitted 1 year ago by PlanetOfOrd to c/adhd

18 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I'm sure lots of ADHDers know what I mean. Situations where you're not meaning ill intent, but the way that a situation turns out makes it seem like you're the bad guy/girl.

How do you handle the situation without seeming like a victim or that you're making excuses for yourself? Do you explain the situation or just accept it and hope that enough time will reveal your true character?

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] justlookingfordragon 41 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Poorly. I handle it poorly.

Every time it happens I end up feeling like an idiot, being percieved as awkward and verbally clumsy, and I feel guilty about having ruined the conversation. I haven't found a good way to cope with it yet ... but it's one of the reasons why I prefer things like SMS, email and chat for communication rather than talking to others directly. I can delete and rewrite text as often as I want to until it reads okay, but I can not rehearse an entire conversation beforehand and then just rewind whenever I said something that "doesn't fit", so I have to deal with the consequences. Smalltalk with coworkers is the worst.

[–] 0xDEADBEEF 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

One thing that’s helped me out with verbal clumsiness is trying to use my hands more when I talk, it gives me an extra layer of conveyance and I kind of engage more with what I am saying as I say it, YMMV though

[–] essjay24 1 points 1 year ago

use my hands more when I talk

This is so true for me that I started sitting back from the camera during teleconferences so people could see my hand gestures.