this post was submitted on 21 Aug 2023
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I just don't want to deal with another human in real time. What if I don't know what to say? I feel like I'm playing Phoenix Wright online.
I this a phone calls thing, or just a talking to people at all thing? Like, is it difficult to have a conversation with someone at dinner, for example?
For me it is phone calls specifically, that are more stressful than any other type of communication.
Face to face with a stranger isn't exactly easy, either, but I would prefer that even over leaving a voicemail.
I wonder if it's just because it feels less natural, and therefore forced, as if you're having to perform.
When I was young, I had a lot of anxiety over calling things like businesses, doctors offices, places where people had an official role. It felt intimidating. What eventually got me past that was remembering that though these people are in an official capacity, they're also people who can joke and make mistakes and ramble and get confused, just like me. Once I stopped seeing them as their capacity, that feeling kinda went away.
I think it is related to auditory processing issues. (sponsored by ADHD) Video-calls, Zoom etc... are not as bad. I guess, because I do rely on gestures a lot? Also, they're usually scheduled in advance - So I can prep by getting comfy in a quiet place and take notes with both hands on the keyboard.
That actually makes a lot of sense to me. Such a large portion of how we communicate is in our body language, I can see how stripping that out would leave someone scrambling a bit in that situation. Thanks for sharing!