this post was submitted on 12 Aug 2023
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Men's Liberation

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I am very low contract with my mother and sister because they kept my ex as a friend after all her bullshit through the divorce. I put on a show for my son to have sort of normal family times at holidays, etc. but I mostly do not connect with them outside of time with my son. We are NOT friends.

So, internet stranger. I understand the crazy bullshit that comes with divorce for a man.

And it is amazing how quickly and thoroughly men are discarded after a divorce. Disposable indeed.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Sorry to hear that you went through that.

In a perfect world I could have had an amicable divorce from my ex and everybody could have stayed in touch and been happy.

Instead I had a "Michael Bay" divorce where everything went really explosive and badly. It's sad because I see a lot of example -- such as our own prime minister -- who have a great divorce where everybody is respectful and mature and life goes happily on.

I've tried to explain to my dad how screwed up it is that he maintains a relationship with my ex despite my zero contact with my kids but he doesn't care. Actually, he went to my exes wedding with her new husband last month, which involved him flying to my city. He didn't visit me, which is really the extra cherry on the shit sundae.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Yeah, divorce was similar for me. I was discussing and considering collaborative divorce with my lawyer until I was served the restraining order...which I got dismissed. That started about 2 years of legal theater propelled by stupid amounts of money.

You do find out just how selfish your family is when you go through a divorce, don't you? And how little they really care about you.

At a certain point I went "Bush" on family/friends: If you're not for me then you're against me. I still think it brought me back to some sort of sanity in dealing with people. And taking the trash people out of my life.