My company finally is asking politely that we have to go to the office twice a week. Or else. That else is not yet defined, but obviously there will be consequences of not going to the office.

I have been at this company for 15 years, from junior dev to manager.

I did a daily commute of about 40 mins in the morning, 40 to an hour back, never gave a second thought about that. That was normal.

After pandemics, I found out all I have been missing on my kids growing up. My second kid is much more attached to me since she saw me daily, even if I was in my office room at home, she got to see me more often.

So I found out how much my life improved by doing working at home. Hell in the middle of this sentence my kid just showed me some thing she drew.

I stood my ground, I basically politely told HR that I am not going back. And actually my reasons make sense, I work with people in other countries, they don't care where I am.

And it will affect my performance, driving to the office, moving all my equipment, and having people around trying to talk to me will take a toll.

So yeah, I am polishing my resume, because there is no turning back now. I will be shunted if I ask for a raise, they can easily say "hey but you are not coming to the office, how come you want a raise if you are not part of the team", never mind that I do everything that is expected and more.

Just off my chest I guess, and anxious about the future.

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[–] BilboBargains 19 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Things you never hear people say 'I'm looking forward to a long commute and spending all day in an office'.

Why is this even a discussion point?Working from home has been such a game changer. It's better for family life, it's better for the environment, it's efficient. Much of the anxiety around homeworking is the suspicion that people work less. The fact is, if your job sucks you are not doing it wherever it happens to be.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My commute to work is a 8 minute walk. I used to drive 30 minutes one way and was so exhausted after driving I would fall asleep after getting home.

Removing the commute time and mental demand from driving and replacing it with a walk home where I can unpack my thoughts has massively improved my personal life. I'm really lucky, the pay is bad for my position but the alternative is a 10k pay increase with 60-90 minutes driving a day (plus CA gas).

I manage people that make the same or slightly more than me, but they drive 30-60 min one way, so in the end I'm benefiting more.

[–] BilboBargains 2 points 1 year ago

Long drives can be extremely stressful, whether we consciously acknowledge it or not. My last job was extremely stressful but one thing that wasn't adding to that was the ten minute bike ride each way. I never had to worry about traffic and being late because it was always ten minutes. Commuting is often under-rated as a quality of life factor. I think the most stress inducing bicycle commute by far was the day I ran over a squirrel.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

What you will hear people say is that they're happy to get out of the house, and see people in real life instead of through a screen.

I was negotiating the number of days down to one, coming from 3 in the proposal, for my entire team until 1 guy said he didn't mind coming in more often. During the negotiations. With the boss. They clocked it at 2 days. They kept circling back to the guy saying there clearly are people who want to come in more often. I coulda slapped him then and there. WFH is optional. He could have come in any day he wanted, 5 days or whatever, he just didn't want to sit there alone.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Oh, if he were on my team, "alone" would be the least of his worries.

[–] BilboBargains 0 points 1 year ago

Exactly. We want to decide when it is appropriate to attend the office. I personally dislike video con meetings, there is something about being in the company of people that improves communication and promotes a sense of well-being. On the other hand, the price of meeting people in person is feeling completely exhausted from waking at 5am and coming home at 8pm. That's sustainable and actually desirable one day a week but there's no way I could do this every day without making myself miserable. I count my blessings that I'm in a position to make this choice.