this post was submitted on 03 Feb 2025
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Here's an idea: stop thinking that you are inherently any different than a woman.
Attempting to "be a man" inherently dehumanizes women; in my not so humble opinion, the artificial divide between man and woman has caused more harm and destruction to global society than anything else in history.
But I am different to a woman, specifically if there's a violent threat or harm to the family.
I will step in first to handle it, I'm more suited to it. I won't be able to do it the other way around where I take the kids and run while the wife deals with whatever the threat is.
Or a simpler example, if I get attacked, I do not want the wife to step in. However, if she is attacked, I will step in.
Unless we're limiting the discussion to exclude those situations?
No better way to legitimize male violence than to make it in defense of the family. How about trying to build a better society where women and children don't have to be afraid? That wouldn't be any fun though, would it? You just want an excuse to be violent and pretend it makes you a hero, join a bunch of soccer hooligans and leave your family out of it.
If your contribution as a male consists of violence then I'd rather you don't contribute. Ask yourself what kind of society requires that males contribute with violence? Can we not do better? At least use your physical strength to open jars or something useful. Where men view their ability to physically hurt people as a positive attribute women will live in fear because for you live out your hero fantasy it is required that women are in danger, usually from other men.
It sounds like you have been deeply hurt and I am sorry that happened. I am not the guy who did that to you or someone you care about.
There are good men out there who would die to protect their children from other harms, are not predators and move society forward with a healthy contribution. I am one of those, not the other kind.
In terms of building a better world, that sounds amazing. Until that job is done, it definitely falls to me at a minimum to keep my family safe, because for now the world still has real dangers and predators that can hurt them.
Jfc nobody hurt me. I'm just not going to jump on the glorification of male violence bandwagon on the basis of 'my violence is special and not like the others'. That old man who shot a boy for coming to his door thought he was protecting his family too no doubt.
I think you hate me way too much for nothing, and you don't know me.
If this is how you engage in dialog with someone you don't know at all you will never build a better world like you claim to want.