this post was submitted on 19 Jan 2025
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Capitalism doesn't sell performance. It sell 'potential' and 'perceived gains'.
I sell my dates on my potential wealth and potential penis size. People need to get on the capitalism grindset.
"Both my cock and my investment portfolio are well positioned to overperform both ongoing quarterly and year over year growth as compared to standard cocks and investment portfolios, should volatility continue to remain close to historical averages."
Breakdown of how this doesn't actually mean anything, because I'm autistic:
This doesn't actually mean anything.
"Well positioned to do X" just means 'could happen'.
It doesn't actually promise any outsized gains at all, it ascribes no likelihood to this scenario, it does not quantify anything, at all, and it even conditions the potential hypothetical gains on a the vaguely defined condition of volatility remaining 'close' to 'historical averages', again totally unquantified.
This would be dubious to expect to continue in perpetuity and without deviation, because both for the market and for people's interpersonal lives, the extremely normal pattern is that volatilty remains within 'normal' bounds for a while, but will also predictably have short but highly intense bursts from time to time.
So these entirely predictable volatility bursts break the condition.
... But to someone with less knowledge of or experience with both markets and relationships, it seems good that something is well positioned to exceed standard growth, it seems reasonable that things will stay close to historical averages, so the 'vibe' takeaway is positive, and the mentioned (potential but utterly without basis) outsized growth was both in the short term and enduring year over year!
Even though the actual content of what was said is literally nothing beyond jargon laden flim flam that has no ultimate literal meaning, nor legal liability.
Hey, give credit where it's due.
Some people work quite hard to make sure their jargon laden flim flam has no ultimate literal meaning nor legal liability.
And women sell dates on their potential to do that thing that was discussed but then try to backtrack by pretending they thought it was a joke and didn't even bring a banana.
It's what we in the biz would refer to as a "grower", which is in contrast to a "shower".
If you’re gonna sell dates you better be a grower! Dates don’t just grow themselves!
"I have a great venture Idea for you Susan. What if, and hear me out, what if my penis was at least average size! I already have an investor lined up in the bedroom, you'd be crazy to pass on this opportunity"