this post was submitted on 31 Dec 2024
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Leopards Ate My Face

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[–] alaphic 124 points 5 days ago (2 children)

I didn't expect...

Good news everyone!

I've developed a nearly foolproof method for preventing anyone else from sharing this fuckin sucker's experience, and will share it here - free of charge - today only!

It's simple. All you have to do is ask yourself a single question: Does X effect Trump’s Y?

Replace X with the issue or item you're concerned with.

Then replace Y with one of the following: health | self-image | bank account | stock market

If your answer is 'No,' congratulations, you now know that Trump will indeed NOT give a single fuck about your problem. Also, it's probably some sort of peasant issue anyway.

If your answer is 'Yes,' you're likely still fucked somehow! 😁

[–] khannie 20 points 5 days ago

That is a magnificent and I would wager highly accurate algorithm.

[–] Contramuffin 9 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Unfortunately we're starting to see that Trump is being influenced by Musk. So you'll also need to factor in whether a particular issue affects Musk's bank account/pride

[–] homesweethomeMrL 3 points 4 days ago

I would posit that this bromance is only going to last as long as Elmo's money does. As soon as he's in office and Elmo keeps showing up to "share" the spotlight he'll fire him by tweet on the toilet, in the standard fashion.