this post was submitted on 01 Oct 2024
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That's a bit vague. What exactly are we talking about here?
A portal that worships Satan? A portal of Satan's making? Is it a portal that only Satan himself can use, or can anyone can use it and it leads them directly to Satan's location, or magically turns them Satanic upon using it?
A portal in the style of Satan. Essentially fiery goth.
A copy of the game Portal previously owned by Satan.
These are the scientific questions we really need to be asking. We'll get our best people on it. The very best, they say. We'll go hands waving "wifty wifty wifty" and boom, we'll understand which democrat is on top of this satanic portal situation.