this post was submitted on 28 Jul 2024
53 points (96.5% liked)
ADHD
9742 readers
307 users here now
A casual community for people with ADHD
Values:
Acceptance, Openness, Understanding, Equality, Reciprocity.
Rules:
- No abusive, derogatory, or offensive post/comments.
- No porn, gore, spam, or advertisements allowed.
- Do not request for donations.
- Do not link to other social media or paywalled content.
- Do not gatekeep or diagnose.
- Mark NSFW content accordingly.
- No racism, homophobia, sexism, ableism, or ageism.
- Respectful venting, including dealing with oppressive neurotypical culture, is okay.
- Discussing other neurological problems like autism, anxiety, ptsd, and brain injury are allowed.
- Discussions regarding medication are allowed as long as you are describing your own situation and not telling others what to do (only qualified medical practitioners can prescribe medication).
Encouraged:
- Funny memes.
- Welcoming and accepting attitudes.
- Questions on confusing situations.
- Seeking and sharing support.
- Engagement in our values.
Relevant Lemmy communities:
lemmy.world/c/adhd will happily promote other ND communities as long as said communities demonstrate that they share our values.
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
I'm reluctant to say lower your expectations, but if you're trying to find a job, maybe it isn't the right time to go on vacation.
In another comment, someone mentioned planners and improvisors, and you said you were the second one. I disagree. I think you're a planner, but you're so afraid that you'll spend all this time planning and something won't go exactly right, so you're not planning anything at all.
What if you tried making more general plans? Book a flight and a hotel nearby. Look at various places that you could visit while you're there, and just leave it at that. If you want to check something out, go do it. If you see something cool on the way, check it out. Nobody's best memories are about how closely they followed a schedule. It's definitely good to have a plan, but getting distracted on a side quest doesn't mean you can't enjoy the rest of the day.
Actually you hit the nail on the head there. Yeah I guess I should learn to improvise and go with what I've got more. For some reason I've got this really bad habit of thinking up the experience I'd like to live and trying to make it reality, instead of seeing what's actually out there and going with that... I don't know where it came from or what to do about it
Do you have any thoughts about what I should do about this? I've noticed this is a pattern in my behaviour and I thnk it really trips me up...
Well, it's really easy to say "Just change the way you think!", which would probably fix everything, but in reality, we all know it's not that simple. I may be good at going with the flow, but I have a whole mess of other issues that I wish I could just "change the way I think".
Maybe try thinking of examples from your life when things didn't go exactly to plan, but everything still worked out in the end, or maybe even turned out better than planned.
Surprises happen. Some are good. Some are bad. Some you can directly influence, others are out of your control.
If you can't make the best situation, make the best of the situation!