this post was submitted on 28 Jun 2024
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[Silly Thought Exercise] What over-the-top absurd person would you choose to replace Biden who you think could actually body Trump, and why? (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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EDIT: Thanks so much everyone. Great answers. This has been fun. Keep it going as long as you want!

DISCLAIMER: Silly Thought Exercise: NOT AN ENDORSEMENT OF REPLACING BIDEN. I personally do not think replacing Biden is a good idea at this stage in the election. I think that's more dangerous than keeping him, sadly, but he's who we've got. I'm just looking for shitposty thoughts on this question, please and thank you.

What-over-the-top absurd person would you choose to replace Biden who you think could actually body Trump, and why?

For an example, my choice would be based on the idea that the only thing that makes a bully like Trump wilt is a bigger bully. Secondly, US citizens love trash talking and sports and absolutely will vote for someone who is already famous, they certainly love their celebrities. Finally, what better sport for trash talk than basketball?

In that, my choice would be basketball legend Larry Bird. (he's famously apolitical, so it's hard to know if he would actually be politically aligned against Trump.)

...but, the thing is, Larry Bird is a masterclass trash talker.

And that is really what throws Trump off and throws him into obscene tantrums where his composure is lost and he comes off like a whining loser: when he's been taken down a peg by someone else. Nothing sticks deeper in his craw. I don't think he could handle Larry Bird's level of shit-talk, Bird is like god-tier.

I can imagine Bird calling Trump out and saying he can smell his shit-filled diaper from across the auditorium, obviously Bird would describe more colorfully than I. The thing is, I can also see that absolutely throwing Trump into hysterics.

Also, at 67 Bird's a fucking spring chicken compared to Biden or Trump.

So, I'm hoping for answers that are a bit silly, like this. Larry Bird is obviously not actually a good choice for this. I just like chuckling at the idea, because real life has gotten so absurd I need to hide in even deeper absurdity.

What's your absurd Biden replacement? Please, I think we could use some laughs.

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[–] [email protected] 37 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (5 children)

~~John~~ Stewart

Edit: Sorry I meant his brother, Jon Stewart

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I don't know John Stewart, but Jon Stewart would be an interesting choice.

[–] SkybreakerEngineer 10 points 6 months ago

At this point I'd take either the superhero or the comedian

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I'm not even sure if this one is silly as much as it is serious. Too bad Stewart would never want the job!

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Not wanting the job is a good thing. That's how it should be...

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago

I don’t care if he doesn’t want the job

I think Biden has done great stuff (domestically πŸ™) and I would expect good policies from him and obviously a dead plant would be a better president than Trump, but his debate performance is kinda hard to put a good spin on

And therefore it is clear that what the world needs to see is a Jon Stewart vs Donald Trump debate

[–] Today 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I would be so excited to vote for a Biden/Stewart ticket!!! Jon could continue to do Daily Show Mondays for now, and then take over when it's time!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

Like the emoluments clause matters any more. He can just collect his salary after he leaves office, as a treat.

[–] YarHarSuperstar 2 points 6 months ago

Just Stewart.