Casual Conversation

2310 readers

102 users here now

Share a story, ask a question, or start a conversation about (almost) anything you desire. Maybe you'll make some friends in the process.

RULES (updated 01/22/25)

Be respectful: no harassment, hate speech, bigotry, and/or trolling. To be concise, disrespect is defined by escalation.
Encourage conversation in your OP. This means including heavily implicative subject matter when you can and also engaging in your thread when possible. You won't be punished for trying.
Avoid controversial topics (politics or societal debates come to mind, though we are not saying not to talk about anything that resembles these). There's a guide in the protocol book offered as a mod model that can be used for that; it's vague until you realize it was made for things like the rule in question. At least four purple answers must apply to a "controversial" message for it to be allowed.
Keep it clean and SFW: No illegal content or anything gross and inappropriate. A rule of thumb is if a recording of a conversation put on another platform would get someone a COPPA violation response, that exact exchange should be avoided when possible.
No solicitation such as ads, promotional content, spam, surveys etc. The chart redirected to above applies to spam material as well, which is one of the reasons its wording is vague, as it applies to a few things. Again, a "spammy" message must be applicable to four purple answers before it's allowed.
Respect privacy as well as truth: Don’t ask for or share any personal information or slander anyone. A rule of thumb is if something is enough info to go by that it "would be a copyright violation if the info was art" as another group put it, or that it alone can be used to narrow someone down to 150 physical humans (Dunbar's Number) or less, it's considered an excess breach of privacy. Slander is defined by intentional utilitarian misguidance at the expense (positive or negative) of a sentient entity. This often links back to or mixes with rule one, which implies, for example, that even something that is true can still amount to what slander is trying to achieve, and that will be looked down upon.

Casual conversation communities:

Related discussion-focused communities

founded 2 years ago

MODERATORS

Why is it that I fail when learning new hobbies/ things with groups? (self.casualconversation)

submitted 8 months ago by Grogon to c/[email protected]

16 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I don't have many examples, but to bring one or two up one was my scuba diving course in Thailand.

The dive instructor showed everything and we copied him in a pool. And everytime we had to do all the things I just looked bad.

Another example was climbing. They show how to tie the knot to harness, everyone successfully manages to tie the knot and I am standing their like an idi**.

The thing is what I observed is that if I have time to do things on my own and no pressure I seem to do "okay" and once I can do it I do it blind.

Anyone else experience this? What can I do? I am at a point I am afraid to learn new things because of failing infront of others.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

So..

You want to learn new things and now you are getting discouraged.

Why you wanted to learn new things? Was it adventure calling, random idea, someone gave you some advice/ideas or you were great in your imagination at them before even starting? Whatever it was, learning new things can be equally great and hard.

You seem to be failing at new things.

This is how learning works. Some people fail more and harder, or need more explanations, or more trial and error until the “thing” clicks in their head.

Did I miss anything? There is not enough information but let me shoot in the dark:

The thing with diving or climbing, was it a one and done thing or do you continue doing it anyhow?

Why I am asking? There is quite a big difference in “I want to learn new things”, “I want to try/test new things”, “I am bored and just wanna do something” and “I am seeking for a (new) lifelong passion/hobby” or even harder “I want to get really good at X”.. Depending on what your actual need is, there is plenty of possibilities why the process and effects are not satisfying for you.

What does “looked bad” mean? Was it a comment from your instructor, or someone from the group gave you a weird look or laughed? Or you had it recorded and you compared your technique to others?

Sounds a little like some form of stage-fright, you can process the instructions and get what the instructor is saying but the problem begins during the “performance” part? Following the instructions and so on? This is quite common, especially during group classes with random people you don’t know. They can be quite chaotic and overstimulating.. There is not much you can do to avoid it, but there is a lot you can do to work through it.

Part about “no pressure”

Maybe a form of group classes is too much and just not for you at the beginning — maybe one on one approach would suit your needs better?

There are so many angles to approach this subject..