It's not my first, my advice is to make sure you've got some nice drinks in (Saicho sparkling tea, here), and remember that if it all gets a bit much, you can slip away for some quiet moments, or just leave if you need to.
I like cycling, and my other option, taking public transport, entails having to deal with far too many other people in proximity first thing in the morning, so I found a way that works for me. I get my bag with my work clothes ready the night before, and put my cycling clothes out, so everything is ready when I wake up.
Black coffee and baked eggs with mixed vegetables, done in the pressure cooker. I usually cycle to work and ten miles with nothing but coffee inside me would be bad, so I managed to find something I like, and because I'm in the UK I can leave the eggs out on the counter so when I fall out of bed and into my cycling gear and stumble through to the kitchen for coffee, the eggs are there, the pressure cooker is there, and it's a two minute job to get everything cooking while I make coffee.
One of the pinned posts is about better sleep, you could see if any of those tips are helpful.
I'm sorry you're struggling but I'm glad you're seeking extra help.
I've said it before but don't try harder, try different - extra supports, different supports. By that I mean:
- If religious AA doesn't work, try secular AA or SMART recovery or Recovery Dharma.
- If 0.5% beers put you at risk of relapsing, avoid them. There's lots of interesting craft sodas and other things to try these days instead.
- Talk to your doctor about medical support, about referrals to therapy, about anything else they can offer. And so on. 🫂
Good to see you again 😊
You've got to find what works best for you, and if what you're doing isn't working, then stop doing it. Don't try harder, try different.
Did you see the post about SMART recovery? That could be worth a look.
Congratulations!