Vupperware

joined 2 years ago
[–] Vupperware 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I haven’t been able to let this thought go since it first entered my mind years ago, but I have no means of providing evidence. The scale of our universe does not allow a lowly person like me to provide evidence for such theories :(

[–] Vupperware 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I've got a good one for you.

If all you want is the really juicy stuff, skip down to the last paragraph. I think it's better with the exposition, though. I've also put a TL;DR at the bottom.

Two weeks before I moved in to my room, Ii received a message from one of my suitemates (I had contacted all of my room/suitemates before moving in, because I'm all about establishing relationships). The contents of this message were short, vague, and cryptic; all it said was "Check your roommates insta". Initially, I assumed my suitemate saw something funny: Cringy selfies, chain posts, or the like. While what I found on his page was funny to a degree, it was none of the aforementioned things. It was hentai.

There was so much of it, and it went on for so long, I was blown away. Visions of Anime Posters covering the walls raced through my head, and so too did the thought of him enjoying and posting these pictures. (with over 22,000 posts, he puts a new image up around every 3 hours).

As move-in day arrived, I was overtaken with a morbid curiosity. What did this kid look like? Upon arriving, I opened the door to our room to be greeted by the one and only Hentai God. At first, his appearance was nothing out of the ordinary, just an African-American 18yo.

What quickly came to my attention, however, is that while the Hentai God did in fact work out, he only worked his arms. This led to a stature that can best be described as resembling that of Larry from SpongeBob. There's nothing particularly wrong with that, but I would think that if you put that much effort into your arms you would at least develop a little bit of upper body strength in other areas.

There's more to my roommate than enjoying hentai and being topheavy, though; He will wait to go to bed until I arrive, sitting in his rolly chair and staring at the door. He'll record me doing mundane things and put them on his snapchat story without asking me or even making it remotely clear I was ever being recorded. He'll talk to himself, often repeating the same few words over and over again for up to an hour. He'll listen to the same song day in and day out, making cryptic hand gestures while he listens. Sometimes he even breathes as one snores while he's awake. I talked to my RA, and he says that despite all these things he cannot move me to another room because dorms are "past full capacity". Wish me luck, everybody.

TL;DR Roommate loves Hentai and almost has me convinced he's mentally insane.

[–] Vupperware 6 points 2 years ago (3 children)
[–] Vupperware 6 points 2 years ago (2 children)

It’s good that they’re finally making this nutrient more readily available. I’ve been trying to get more of it in my diet!

[–] Vupperware 18 points 2 years ago

I’m excited to see your community grow, keep it up!

[–] Vupperware 4 points 2 years ago

What a fall from grace.

[–] Vupperware 2 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Surely those are not actual eyes. My mental well-being is contingent on those NOT being eyes.

[–] Vupperware 1 points 2 years ago

What the heck, so much wasted space!

[–] Vupperware 2 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Grub hub dancing diverse man

Old spice ad clones

Better help pandering to lgbt in garish and obnoxious ways

Liberty mutual stupid emu

And I realize that me mentioning these proves their efficacy from a word of mouth perspective, be I alone will not be more likely to purchase these products as a result of these ads.

I’m all for equal treatment, regardless of genetic makeup and sexual orientation, but when you use that stuff as a marketing tool, it offends me. Do you think I’m an ant? Do you think that your injection of humanitarian issues is going to make me more likely to buy a fucking therapy service?

I firmly believe that it won’t .

[–] Vupperware 4 points 2 years ago (6 children)

I know there’s a lot of money pumped into advertising, and I’ve seen SO MANY people say “if you don’t think it works, it works” but can anyone provide a justification for that claim?

Thinking on it now, I realize that people who are hating on advertising don’t realize just how many people there are.

This thread got me thinking about which ads I’ve succumbed to MONETARILY, and these are the ones that come to mind:

-Quip Toothbrush

That’s all that comes to mind.

[–] Vupperware 6 points 2 years ago

I find it incredibly upsetting when an ad campaign catches on with such vitality that people start quoting it.

Ads are invasive as is, so we really need to become personal shills for the companies that showed us something “funny”?

There is so much humor all around us — especially online. Why do so many people chose to embrace the shitty, forced humor of advertisements to the point where they deliberately regurgitate the ad, using it as an office joke or ice breaker?

[–] Vupperware 7 points 2 years ago

You make an interesting point, and I cannot deny the validity of your claim.

However, this was directed towards corporate advertisements. The moment I see © or ™ is the moment I stop being swayed.

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