RadicalEagle

Fucked up that she lied about her age. Fucked up that he cheated on his wife.

incoherent sobbing

Decent rotation. Hydra is always good for farming king salmonids.

Takes a wise person to willingly admit when they lack knowledge imo

No, but I want to give my landlord the opportunity (responsibility?) to see me as a person and not just an income source.

There was a great episode of This American Life where they interviewed a kid who took over managing one of his dad's properties. One of the tenants was a couple who had lost a child, and they fell behind on rent (and on life in many ways).

One of the things that stood out to me was how difficult it was for the kid to put in the work needed to accommodate this couple. He worked his ass off coming up with payment plans and helping them budget. His big takeaway was that he didn't ever want to get involved with his tenants again because it was too heartbreaking to be in a position where you're supposed to evict someone that's struggling.

Act three of this episode if you want to check it. https://www.thisamericanlife.org/323/the-super

I can 100% relate to the feeling of "if I don't know the plan I don't know where to start".

The conclusion I came to is that it's impossible to know if there is a "plan". But hypothetically if there was a plan, what would you want it to look like? For me that plan would be "I'll do the things I think are right. I'll do the things that make me feel good (enjoying life, helping other people enjoy their lives) and when I mess up I'll forgive myself and have faith that others will forgive me."

Yeah for sure. So I grew up around a bunch of people who thought tattoos were inappropriate. And because everyone said they were inappropriate, I grew up believing they were inappropriate.

It wasn't until later in life I realized I actually thought tattoos were cool and the only reason I didn't have any is because I never actually made a choice based on my opinion. I was living based on someone else's.

(Or replace "tattoos" with whatever you in particular feel bad/stressed about.)

I can't give you any advice for your specific experience, but I know for me I've been a lot happier with myself after I realized that just because I think other people might judge me doesn't mean I have to judge myself the same way. It's up to you to look the way that makes you feel good, and no one except yourself can really tell you what that should be.

If you feel the need to change something but you can't figure out what you want to change I recommend meditating on it and being honest with yourself. A lot of times my indecision has been the result of cognitive dissonance that I didn't fully understand until years later when I actually started consciously unpacking my values.

No. Peace of mind comes from trusting, not from knowing.

I realized what I needed to do was record what I'm practicing and listen to it in order to identify where I think I can improve. Incredibly mundane realization, but it was fun getting there.

Yeah for sure. You can't logically prove that world view one way or the other, but it's something worth thinking about and meditating on imo.

I broadly interpret "form relationships with people that make your life better and avoid shitty people" as "Do what makes you happy with the assumption that everyone is doing the same thing, and that the choice to pursue happiness is correct."

I definitely get the sentiment of "avoiding shitty people", but I do think that there is a time and place for it. I have some family members with some really hurtful world views and I still choose to engage with them when I know it will bring happiness for both of us.

But yeah, I don't think my philosophy is logically perfect by any means. It is admittedly irrational, but it's the best thing I've found for being able to live my life the way I feel like I should be living.

Unless you think that everyone is the same person and humanity is just a distributed consciousness. In which case anyone you end up with at any time is the person you're supposed to be with. At which point the key to moving forward is trusting and forgiving "yourself".